An exhausted mum turned to our community of experienced parents to seek advice on how to handle her very clingy baby.
Her little one wants to suck all the time, and she’s feeling a lot like a human pacifier …
#HELP! I’d love to hear other parents’ opinions on giving babies a dummy/pacifier? My hubby and I are clashing on this point – I’d like to try it, as my 3 month old seems to want to constantly suckle and won’t go to sleep unless at the breast. I really need a break! But my husband is dead against them – he believes it’s a habit we’ll just have to break later, and that it’s a bit cruel to give something only to eventually take it away. I always agreed with his point until now – but I’m getting desperate! Any tips or advice – should we try a dummy? What else can I do?
Other parents quickly weighed in on the use of dummies and shared some ideas on balancing different approaches to parenting too.
It’s not forever
Lots of parents pointed out that all children eventually do give up their dummies, and the benefits outweigh any perceived concerns.
My son had one, not for very long though. And he also learnt to self soothe, he started sucking his thumb. I was more worried about him sucking his thumb because how do you take that away? He stopped by himself. I was so pleased. Give it a try. Maybe try it once and see how it goes and decide from there. – Tallia Beri
Give the baby the dummy. When it’s time to get rid of it, call it a yucky and they will hand it over, or dummy fairy visits to take it away for the new babies. A lot easier to take away a dummy over a thumb which will be the next option. – Kelly Henry
So is it cruel to give the baby breastmilk just to take it away later? If it settles bub and gives you a break then I can’t see the problem. 2 of my kids had dummies and so far no issues with giving them up. Plenty of things you give babies that you take away as they get older. – Wendy Monaghan
Mums need a break
Many mums suggested that dads who are against dummies should step up to soothe the baby and give exhausted mums some down time.
We gave both of our kids dummies and they were actually extremely easy to get rid of going cold turkey. One was 20 months and the other was 14 months when we got rid of them. The 14 months one was the easiest. I would just remind your husband nicely that you are the one who has to deal with it. My husband has always told me it’s my choice because I’m the one who has to feed and deal with them. If you are at your wits’ end you need to do what is best for you at the time! – Emily Morris
We used one with our daughter. She is two and has self-weened during the day. We are working on nights. My smarty pants reply is if the baby wants to suckle all the time and he wants to let it happen and not use the dummy then he can offer up his nipple for soothing purposes. (It has been done by some tribes) – Jen Rocha
I would be asking him to try to settle bub then and see how he copes. I can guess that he will be changing his mind on a dummy pretty quickly ? you need to have a break too! – Stacey Newman
Fact is you don’t see teenagers wandering around with dummies in their mouths now do you? A dummy is not for life, but might feel like a total life-saver for tired parents (and babies too!)
You can read all the helpful advice given, on the original Facebook post here:
#HELP! I'd love to hear other parents' opinions on giving babies a dummy/pacifier? My hubby and I are clashing on this…
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