Newly postpartum Chrissy Teigen talks mesh undies, perineums and bad dads

Posted in Newborn.

Chrissy Teigen’s taken to motherhood the second time around like a duck to water. So much so, in fact, she is delightfully regaling us with tales from the trenches …

Harping on a bit

Chrissy’s at home, recovering from her birth and getting used to life as a mum of two, but that doesn’t mean she’s keeping life low-key. Baby Miles was born last week (named for jazz great, Miles Davis in case you were wondering!) and Chrissy’s already shared lots of details about how the family are adjusting to their newest addition.

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If you haven’t seen @aliwong’s new Netflix special, you are bad at picking Netflix specials #asianpearunderwear

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Yesterday, Chrissy posted a delightful photo of her with a sundress slung low on her hips, mesh undies extending up to her naked torso and baby Miles planted firmly on the breast.

Comparing herself to a mesh-wrapped nashi pear, Chrissy ignored the fact that two-year-old Luna was rather hauntingly playing the harp in the background, instead urging followers to watch fellow mum Ali Wong’s comedy special on Netflix.

“If you haven’t seen @aliwong’s new Netflix special, you are bad at picking Netflix specials #asianpearunderwear” a deadpan Chrissy wrote on Instagram, alongside the eye-catching harp-pear-mesh-undies situation.

Nothing to see here

This is every mum, really …

Your naked toddler might be spooning last night’s leftovers into the back of a toy dump truck, chanting inappropriate rap lyrics as the fridge door swings wide, but it doesn’t even rate with you.

You turn your back and push valiantly on – still in your PJs at 3pm – determined to have this five minute conversation with your bestie and maintain links to the outside world. #SoBrave

Read more about Chrissy Teigen and John Legend:

Ali Wong’s special was not the only thing Luna and Chrissy had on the telly recently.

The pair watched Luna and Miles’ dad – John Legend – performing at the Billboard Music Awards – and they had opinions on that too.

Luna reclined on the couch expressionless as she watched her father give it his all: “She is uhhhh not thrilled with this tribute ,” Chrissy posted of her husband’s performance. Perhaps it needed more harp?

“Go take care of it!!! Disgusting!”

Chrissy also took the opportunity to hat-tip a double-standard, calling John out for being away from home so soon after his baby’s birth.

“Wow didn’t u just have a baby John smh go take care of it !!!!!! disgusting,” she jokingly trolled.

And honestly, she has a point, imagine if she’d stepped out three days after the birth to attend an event. The mum-shamers would descend faster than you can say “asian pear underwear”.

Chrissy then encouraged her actually-not-digusting-it-was-just-a-joke husband to be home for dinner by 9 because it was short rib night. And honestly we wished she was our mum after this all played out.

NB: John tweeted a video of himself saying – “I’m already at the airport, I’ll be home by 8” and followed up with a clip of the ribs, simmering on the stovetop. He made it home, everyone!

Baby boy: 1 point

The Lipsync Battle host revealed some other details about Miles’ birth on Twitter, noting that she’d navigated the birth with her perineum pretty much unscathed and that he was – as we suspected – a few weeks early.

“I can confirm postpartum life is 90% better when you don’t rip to your butthole. Baby boy: 1 point. Luna: 0″ she wrote.

When asked if Miles looks like Luna, prior to sharing a photo of her new baby boy, she confirmed -” Same nose! He is a few weeks early so he’s litttttttle and makes the teeniest noises. We are in love.”


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