Listen up, people! When I’m planning on having babies is none of your business

Posted in Conception.

Everyone should be more like Emily Bingham. 

Sick of the barrage of unsolicited pregnancy questions, she hatched a brilliant plan.

Taking a stock shot of an ultrasound from Google images, Emily posted it to Facebook with a message that really packs a punch.

It reads: 

“Hey everyone!!! Now that I got your attention with this RANDOM ULTRASOUND PHOTO I grabbed from a Google image search, this is just a friendly P.S.A. that people’s reproductive and procreative plans and decisions are none of your business. NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Before you ask the young married couple that has been together for seemingly forever when they are finally gonna start a family … before you ask the parents of an only-child toddler when a Little Brother or Little Sister will be in the works … before you ask a single 30-something if/when s/he plans on having children because, you know, clock’s ticking … just stop. Please stop. You don’t know who is struggling with infertility or grieving a miscarriage or dealing with health issues. You don’t know who is having relationship problems or is under a lot of stress or the timing just isn’t right. You don’t know who is on the fence about having kids or having more kids. You don’t know who has decided it’s not for them right now, or not for them ever. You don’t know how your seemingly innocent question might cause someone grief, pain, stress or frustration. Sure, for some people those questions may not cause any fraught feelings — but I can tell you, from my own experiences and hearing about many friends’ experiences — it more than likely does.

Bottom line: Whether you are a wanna-be grandparent or a well-intentioned friend or family member or a nosy neighbor, it’s absolutely none of your business. Ask someone what they’re excited about right now. Ask them what the best part of their day was. If a person wants to let you in on something as personal as their plans to have or not have children, they will tell you. If you’re curious, just sit back and wait and let them do so by their own choosing, if and when they are ready.”


Read more about getting pregnant:

We couldn’t have said it better ourselves

We live in increasingly complex times and the choice to have children is a seriously personal one. 

Even for couples hoping to become parents, the journey to conception can be fraught and confusing. There’s no guarantee that you’ll concieve or that if you’re lucky enough to have one healthy child, that you’ll be blessed with more. 

Putting people on the spot in regard to any of their life choices is just not okay – even if your intentions are good. 

Ask about the weather instead.


This post was first published on Kinderling Kids Radio.


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