“We don’t care!” Midwife’s funny pubic hair memo to mums-to-be

Posted in Birth.
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A midwife has taken to social media to tell mums-to-be that they need not stress about tiding up their ‘area’ before giving birth. And honestly, it’s the pubic, we mean public, service announcement we all needed to hear!

Full bush, bald or vajazzled, it doesn’t matter!

The midwife, who goes by the name lozza2442, took to Reddit to reassure pregnant mums they need not lose sleep over their lady gardens (however wild and free) before giving birth, as many of us secretly do. 

“Please don’t worry about pubic hair,” she wrote. “We don’t even notice as long as you have showered in the last week. As long as the baby can come out, we don’t care if you’re full bush, bald as a baby, or something exciting like a lightning bolt/vajazzled.”

The woman, who we all wish was OUR midwife, went on to add that not only does she and every other hospital staff member in the birthing suite not notice or care about our hair, but that is also “doesn’t affect stitches or anything to do with our work.”

Pregnant woman

Clap, clap, lady and really, thank you!

Of course, we all kinda know that worrying about the overgrown state of our area should be the last thing on our minds before giving birth. After all, we have far more important things to stress about – “will I be in tremendous pain, will the baby be OK, will I poop?” that kind of thing, but yet many of us still do. 

I personally remember trying to tackle my map of Tassie in the shower a day before my scheduled c-section. Having a watermelon for a belly meant I couldn’t even see my toes and was therefore impossible. So I gave up and left myself hairy.

When I went in for the surgery, though, I was pleasantly surprised to find the midwives were already standing by with a razor to clear the area they needed to for the procedure, so I need not have been stressed about it. But I know I am not alone in doing so. One of my mum friends even booked a full Brazilian the week before she was due, arranging a babysitter for her other kiddo just so she could make the appointment. Why are we so vain when it comes to pubic hair?!

Well thanks to this midwife, we can all relax because like she says, NO ONE CARES!

Oh, and if you are also having a c-section, and the cut will be made across your lower abdomen and right through your pubic hair region, then the midwife assures us that the hospital staff are all over it, so we don’t have to be.

“We can shave the important part for you with a sterile razor,” she notes.

Yep. So there you have it. Thank you, kind midwife, for this all-important Pubic Service Announcement. We actually did need to hear it. 


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