“Go do a tree wee, please.” Are trees just public urinals to little boys?

Boy running towards trees in park

As my little guy leans towards the tree, shorts dangling around his ankles and cute bum exposed, it occurs to me that he thinks this is some sort of public urinal. 

‘Tree wees’ as we call them, happen whenever my sons need to go and there is no toilet in sight. 

I have two boys, so they are the norm for us, well, them, but I wonder …

What do mums of girls do?

I don’t mind my boys doing tree wees (and yes, I do tell them to go to the toilet before we leave the house, but they are five and three with weak bladders) – so long as they at least try to do them discreetly. Oh, and there is no loo in sight because, you know, I am attempting to raise actual human beings, not wild animals.

But I wonder, what do mums of little girls do in these same situations? I mean for a little one, when you need to go you need to go, toilet or no toilet. I figure they must just let their girls squat and be au-natural too, but then I don’t tend to see it.

When we visit the local park (that doesn’t have a toilet), it seems that little boy after little boy likes to run up to a favourite tree and do a tree wee, while his sisters play. So now I am wondering, do little boys have weaker bladders or do they just like doing tree wees? 

Which brings me to my next thought …

Do those trees harbour wee?

Some park trees are just perfect for a wiz and are usually situated a little distance away from the swings and slippery slides, with a big trunk for a boy (or grown man) to hid behind. But after one of my boys has left a trickle of yellow running down the bark like golden sap, I wonder:

‘Is that wee just seeping into the dirt that is drenched in pee from previous little boys? Is that tree getting ‘watered’ by the wee of every little boy who visits this park? And eww, am I kneeling in it right now as I pull up my three-year-old’s pants?!’  

Will they ever outgrow the tree wee?

I am guessing they will eventually stop with the tree wees. I mean, they will develop better bladder control as they grow up, right? They won’t NEED to go whenever they see a perfect tree to do a wee.

Unless …

Grown man doing a tree wee

This image is a little too familiar to me. Now I am wondering if males, in general, think trees are just public urinals. According to my sons’ dad when he needs to go, and we are nowhere near a loo or too much suburbia (and this includes the park), they are. Hmm, come to think of it, that might be the problem. 


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