An emotional Hilary Duff reveals why she stopped breastfeeding
Actor Hilary Duff is mum to a son and a new baby girl named Banks. She’s just shared her thoughts on mum life – and breastfeeding in particular – on her Instagram account.
- Hilary Duff and Matthew Koma welcomed baby Banks in October
- Hilary is also mum to 7-year-old Luca
- Adjusting to baby Banks has been a challenge
To wean or not to wean?
Giving up breastfeeding is never an easy decision. It’s often a choice that circumstances make for us, perhaps due to issues with supply, feeling overwhelmed or simply wanting to share the feeding load.
Hilary has just shared a lengthy update about the struggle she’s navigated as she made the decision to wean her baby and offer her formula instead.
She noted that juggling work and breastfeeding can mean there is zero time left for other things, and revealed that she agonised over this shift, torturing herself as she decided what would be best for her baby.
“Last week was my last week nursing Banks (my six-month-old),” Hilary wrote. “I am a working mom of two. My goal was to get my little girl to six months and then decide if I (and her of course) wanted to keep going.”
“Pumping at work sucks”
There were lots of things that factored into her decision to stop breastfeeding, and the sucky apparatus involved was one of them.
“Let me tell you. Pumping at work sucks. I had zero downtime and am usually pumping in a hair and make up trailer while four hands work to get me ready for the next scene with lots of other people around. Even if I had the luxury to be in my own room, it’s not even considered a “break” because you have to sit upright for the milk to flow into the bottles!”
“Plus you are having your damn nipples tugged at by an aggressive machine that makes an annoying sound, that echoes through your head day and night (I swear that machine and I had many conversations at midnight and 3 am)!”
“Not chill!”
It’s not only finding the time, energy and wherewithal to pump that’s difficult. Hilary points out that you then need to sterilise and store the equipment and milk carefully, which can be a challenge even if you don’t work outside of the home as Hilary does.
“Your milk supply drastically drops when you stop feeding as often and lose the actual contact and connection with your baby,” she continued. “So I was eating all the feunugreek goats butt blessed thistle fennel cookies/drops/shakes/pills I could get my hands on! It was maddening. (Does fenugreek make anyone else smell like maple syrup and rubber gloves?…not chill)”
“Six wonderful months”
That said, this mum-of-two said that the feeding her baby part of breastfeeding was brilliant.
“I want to say I enjoyed (almost) every moment of feeding my daughter. Felt so lucky to be so close to her and give her that start. I know many women are not able to and for that I am sympathetic and very grateful that I could. For six wonderful months.”
“But I needed a break. I was going to break. With the stress of a dropping milk supply and a baby that was getting bored or not caring about nursing when I was available to. I was sad and frustrated and feeling like a failure all of the time.”
“I wasn’t myself at all”
Hilary hopes that by sharing her experience, it might normalise these conflicting feelings around breastfeeding and weaning.
“I wanted to share this because decide to stop BFing was so emotional and hard. I thought about it ALL day everyday. It was a constant loop in my head. Weighing the pros and cons. And half of the time I wasn’t making any sense. It was about me, and not Banks at that point. I cried so many times and felt so depressed while weaning. I wasn’t myself at all.”
“I am happy to say that I haven’t fed or pumped in three days and it’s crazy how fast you can come out on the other side. I feel fine and happy and relieved and silly that I even stressed on it that hard,” Hilary explained.
“Banks is thriving and I get even more time with her and daddy gets to do more feeds! And mommy gets a tiny bit more sleep! … See you nursing bras … until the next time!”
MORE LIKE THIS ARTICLE
