How to ‘pretend-clean’ your house when you have guests coming around

Posted in Home and Decor.

Fact: small children make lots of mess.

Here’s another fact: small children don’t clean-up said mess.

And life with small children is so hectic, there’s no time to clean up the mess.

Yet you still want to socialise because you’re a grown-up and life with small kids can be a bit tedious sometimes …

So what can you do when you invite people around for a catch-up but you have small children, no time to clean and a really messy house?

You hide the mess, of course!

Here are some tried and tested hacks that busy parents of small children use on the regular, to pretend they have a clean house when people come around.


1.Freshen the air

Nothing says ‘clean’ like walking into a freshly scented room. But there’s no need to actually clean it or anything. Just buy a scented candle, light it and have everyone thinking you always live in a pine forest. Just aim for a subtle fragrance. 

2. Too many toys, so little time?

Dump toys into spare wardrobe drawers and shut drawers. Walk away. Voila! (Also works for random clothes, artwork and other bits and pieces)

3. Embrace your inner Marie Kondo 

Pick up every item that’s driving you crazy, think about the purpose it serves, walk out to the garbage bin and chuck it out. All the cool kids are doing it!

4. Didn’t have time to fold the washing?

No problem. Take that heaving clothes basket, walk into a bedroom and shut the door. Out of sight, out of mind.

5. Tidy bathroom essentials hack

Make sure the toilet is wee-free and there’s a clean towel hanging up near the sink. This gives the impression it’s always like this and allows your guests the courtesy of a stink-free toilet break. #yourewelcome

6. Instant floor space trick

Invest in hooks and hang everything up. The walls may look a little crowded, but the overall floor space generally looks much less chaotic. #winning

7. Confine the catch-up to your backyard (or front porch if you can get away with it!)

Invite your friends over, prepare the coffee and snacks before they arrive and set everything up outside. If it’s raining, bring an umbrella. Make it an adventure! It’ll be fun! Speak in a high-pitched voice so you’ll sound more convincing of just how fun it will be outside your house. Whatever you do, just don’t let them inside!


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