Australian mother and fitness blogger, Nadine Muller, took to Instagram to share some tender, grieving thoughts about weaning her 17-month-old son and ending her breastfeeding journey.
A bittersweet farewell
In her post, Nadine included a photo of the very first time she breastfed her son, Madden, with the words “our beautiful 17 month journey of #breastfeeding may finally be coming to a close.”
Nadine, a fitness trainer and nurse, went on to explain that she had recently gone on a 4-day trip, and figured that her last breastfeed may have been the final one. Like many weaning mothers, the significance of such a milestone moved her deeply: “I savoured every moment; I took in every detail, I dropped a couple of happy tears and he honestly looked at me like ‘job well done mummy’.”
While proud of herself and her baby, Nadine admitted the final feed was bittersweet. “My heart is so full whilst at the same time it aches because I may never have this time with him again, it’s beautiful but it’s scary.”
So many weaning mothers can identify with this. It can be really tough saying goodbye to this early, intimate stage of motherhood. Nadine puts it beautifully when she explains that breastfeeding added so much to her (and her son’s) life: “for us it has been the most gratifying experience, one that I could never choose the right words to say. To say that both Madden & I have been infatuated with our BF journey together would be the understatement of the century.”
But the story doesn’t end there. As we all know, weaning can take time, and Nadine has kept her followers updated with the realities of weaning. Just yesterday, Nadine posted again on Instagram, this time with the heading THE END PART II. She explained that Madden had woken in the night, inconsolable, and she had chosen to breastfeed him.
“Just like that, his worries were completely over,” she described. “It was an instant soothe just like it has always been, his racing heart slowed down, his breathing settled, his teeny body relaxed up against mine skin on skin, he was in heaven, & let’s be bloody honest so was I. Talk about an emotional ride, I cried again some more, but this time silent tears of pure elation & joy as I beautifully watched my son be soothed back to sleep by me and my breast.”
If anything, Nadine’s posts are a reminder that weaning is a deeply personal choice. It’s not always easy, and sometimes it takes time, but ultimately, as she points out, “that choice resides with us & us alone.”
In the meantime, Nadine admits she’s still grappling with her own emotions as the feeds wind down. “It has been an emotional past few days, & whilst our journey isn’t over right now, the end feels like it may still be near. I’m overjoyed that we get to bond in our fav way that bit longer, each feed I cherish even more coz I never know when it will be our last – for good.”
She ended her latest post with a callout to all the women who have shared their baby-led weaning stories and helped her through the past few days. It’s wonderful to see such a strong community of supportive mothers out there.
All the best to Nadine and Madden!
How do you feel about finishing breastfeeding? Share your thoughts, we’d love to hear.