IKEA-inspired baby names to go with that flat-pack cot you bought

Posted in Baby Names.
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Swedish furniture giant IKEA is famous for its interestingly-named and reasonably priced products, and one blogger is reasoning that naming your ACTUAL BABY after something plucked from the IKEA catalogue might not be a terrible idea. #OhReally?

“Work surprisingly well!”

Naming your baby after IKEA furniture might seem ridiculous at first glance, but don’t dismiss the idea!” blogger LucyBC wrote on UK parenting website Baby Centre. “IKEA is known for the charming Scandinavian names it gives its products and many work surprisingly well as baby names.”

We love her positivity, but Lucy didn’t stop there. Oh no. She’s provided proof, nutting out a list of IKEA names she thinks might look good on your baby.

She settled on monikers like Tobias, Stig, Franklin, Ingo and Fredde for boys. Norna, Cilla, Malinda, Elly, Henrika and Johanne were a few on her list for girls. (We came up with Billy all by ourselves, because who hasn’t bought a Billy bookcase at one time or another, or pondered a Billy-named baby?!)

Say my name, say my name

We’ve got to say we don’t hate this concept. A lot of the IKEA names really do seem like they’d look great on a skinny-jeaned, nut-milk swilling toddler. That said, this is probably because a lot of the IKEA product names are actually … names! Shock horror! Of course names are good names for babies, y’all. Sheesh.

While some media outlets are loudly proclaiming IKEA baby names to be the Next Big Thing, we are – as yet – unconvinced.

The fact that little Elly, Tobias, Billy and Cillas are sitting in daycare centres and schools across the globe is not really scientific proof that IKEA are the hottest baby-name inspirers going around. 

More to the story

There’s an entertaining flip side to this story  and it’s the IKEA names you don’t want to call your baby. In fact we think this might be the real story, truth be told. We’ve spent many seconds combing the IKEA catalogue to create our own list inspired by the Baby Centre one. Here it is, without further ado!

Ikea names NOT to call your baby (unless they have a “big personality” or are a Viking)

  1. Bygel
  2. Snoig
  3. Blomster
  4. Urskog
  5. Format
  6. Charmtroll
  7. Dokument
  8. Voxnan
  9. Fubbla
  10. Horda
  11. Poppig
  12. Ypperlig

This article was originally published April 9, 2018

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