We swore it would never happen. But once you have kids of your own, it’s inevitable. Every so often you will say something that sounds eerily familiar. And it will hit you – you’ve done the one thing you swore you would never ever do.
You have turned into your mother.
Admit it – you can agree with at least five of these things, right?
As soon as someone comes over, you offer them a hot beverage and a biscuit.
It’s like a reflex – door bell rings and the hostess within comes out.
You confuse your childrens’ names.
And, by the third time trying to get it right, you give up and just say, “Whoever you are.”
You get excited when a new catalogue arrives in your inbox.
And don’t even get me started on the joy of using a new sponge in the sink. It’s like Christmas. Only cleaner.
You hate leaving the house after 7pm.
You always assumed your parents were antisocial. Turns out, they were just tired.
You use the phrase, “I’m going to count to three….” at least once a day.
Other phrases could include, “Don’t forget your jacket,” “I told you that would happen,” and “Don’t give me that look Mister.”
You’re so used to being called “Mum” that you sometimes don’t turn around when someone uses your name on the street.
In fact, people have a better chance of getting you to notice them if they yell out, “I’m hungry”.
You’ve told your children not to sit so close to the television because it will make them cross-eyed.
And you’ve convinced them to eat their carrots because it’s good for the eyes.
You wipe your child’s face with spit without even a second thought
Ice cream, snot, chocolate, half-chewed crackers – meh….
Organising the Tupperware drawer becomes your relaxation exercise.
And you start to actually keep old containers and jars.
You see your reflection in the mirror first thing in the morning and wonder how your mum got into your bathroom at 5am.
Followed immediately by a promise to yourself to make an appointment with your hairdresser. And perhaps a cosmetic surgeon.
You cringe with embarrassment when a song with dirty lyrics comes on the radio.
And when your kids are in the car, you immediately switch channels and hope they weren’t listening.
You ask your mum for advice.
After all, she raised you didn’t she?
You know how to fold a fitted sheet.
And you fully understand the joy of sleeping on a fitted sheet without a single crease in it.
You have trouble understanding half of the things that come out of your teenager’s mouth.
In fact, you understood him more when he was a toddler.
You vaguely remember what you were like as a child and silently curse yourself for bringing this fate on yourself.
And while you sit on the couch swearing under your breath and yelling at your kids to clean up, your mum is most likely right beside you, laughing hysterically at the circle of life.
Oh the irony.
Have you caught yourself in a motherhood deja vu moment yet?
(bottom image via The Frisky)