Parenting often highlights the charming differences between mums and dads, capturing unique moments that resonate with Australian families. From playful toddler antics to quiet snuggles, understanding Mum vs Dad parenting helps celebrate these special memories. parenting advice. Raising Children Network. Raising Children Network.
After finally putting the baby to bed, you’re on the couch and flipping through your camera rolls. You can see hundreds of beautiful, intimate moments. Your partner is lying on the grass, with your child asleep on his chest. Your toddler is squealing in delight as Dad throws them up into the air. Quiet snuggles on the couch. Laughter in the bath. Perfectly captured milestone memories. baby care.
Then, at the end of the book, you discover a blurry photo of yourself with your baby. Half of your face is out of focus, there are bags under your eyelids, and your shirt has stains. Classic.
Sounds familiar?
You’re not the only one. A recent comic by Canadian artist Victoria Bolduc (@victoria_bolduc_art) has struck a deep, emotional chord with mums around the world–and it’s not hard to see why.
The Comic That Hit a Nerve With Thousands Of Mums
Bolduc’s “Mum vs Dad comic, which has gone viral, is a humorous and raw depiction of a reality that many mothers are all too familiar with.
On the left: a beautiful, serene moment. The scene is almost magical. Dad holds the baby, and stars are gleaming in the distance. This is the type of picture you would frame and hang on your living room wall.
On the right: Mum, wide-eyed with a mess of hair, baby flailing in mid-meltdown and chaos behind her. It’s raw, it’s unfiltered, and it’s real.
The response across social media was immediate and overwhelming.
“PAINFULLY TRUE.”
“This is my life.”
“Spot on.”
Who’s watching my house secretly?!“
Many mothers have left comments echoing the same sentiment. We are the ones who are behind the camera, capturing magic for others… but where do we fit in?
Why mums aren’t in pictures
What’s the story? Why are so many mothers missing from the memories that they have worked so hard to create?
1. Mums are the default documentarians
Many mums assume the role of family historian from the moment their baby is born. We are the ones who remember the milestones and send photos to grandparents.
One mum posted this on Reddit.
I’m always getting these beautiful, meaningful photos of my husband and our children. You look at the dozen photos that my husband has taken with me, and you’ll see I have three chins, while the kids are in mid-blink.
Ouch–but relatable.
Mums often shoulder this emotional burden of memory-keeping silently. While it may appear trivial, the emotional impact is lasting.
2. The Myth of “Being Present “
This comic also reveals the guilt of not being “in the moment” and the guilt that comes with it.
A mother’s story was shared in a Reddit post sparked by Bolduc’s comic.
“My SO used to tell me that I wasn’t really enjoying the moment, because I was snapping pictures instead.” He realises after a few weeks that there are a lot of photos of him with our son, but that I have no pictures of myself with our son other than selfies.
Her frustration was palpable and completely justified.
“NO, babe. You need to take more photos of us together!”
It’s a common misconception that documentation makes a moment less real or felt. Here’s the truth. Sometimes taking a photo can be a way to connect. It’s a way to say “This is important.” This is something I want to keep in mind. “I want you to keep this in mind.”
3. The Invisible Parent Paradox
The invisible work of parenthood is often done by mums. They manage schedules, pack lunches and remember doctor appointments. They also handle emotional meltdowns. And yes, they take the family pictures.
We are often not present in the actual scenes because we work behind the scenes.
Our love is written in meals, socks, and kisses on scraped knees. But it’s rarely captured in photos that tell the story of our family.
Why This Comic Has Such a Deep Impact
Art can sometimes express what words cannot. Bolduc’s two panels highlight a parenting imbalance that is easy to joke about but hard to correct.
This comic is not just funny, but it also has a lot of emotional truth.
This article reveals that mothers feel invisible, even though they are everywhere and do everything.
This article challenges the passive assumption of parenting being equally shared, as the emotional and psychological burden is often disproportionately borne by mothers.
It also reminds us that our children will one day look at family photos and wonder: “Where was Mum?”
What is the emotional impact of being left out of the frame?
You can ask your partner to snap more photos.
For many mothers, it is not only about adding more pictures. It’s all about feeling appreciated, noticed and included.
It’s demoralising when you realise that these moments are being saved only for, and not along with.
Photos aren’t only keepsakes. Photos are proof of existence. Visual legacy.
It reinforces the dangerous narrative that mums don’t matter in family records.
What can partners do to change the narrative?
This is not a game of blame. The majority of partners don’t want to leave mums behind; they just need a gentle reminder. A gentle push. A shift in consciousness.
Here are some things that you can do as a father or partner to a mum.
1. Use the camera with Intention
Wait for her to ask. Take the picture. Take a photo of the mess, the chaos, and the messy hair. This is the real world. Someday, she may delete the photo, but you’ll be happy that you didn’t.
2. Celebrate The Mundane
Mums don’t always look great or glow with happiness. They can be tired, covered with spit up, and counting the minutes until bedtime. But these moments are also important. Take pictures. Celebrate them.
3. Print your Memories
Take the extra step. Create a photo album. Frame a candid moment. Show her that you are part of the story.
4. Documentation is not always the responsibility of
Choose a day, or even a week, in which you will be the family photographer. You’ll be surprised at what you see when you look through the camera.
Mothers, please take note!
Here’s a message for all mums who are reading and nodding:
You are entitled to be included in the photo.
Literally. Literally.
Someone else can take the picture. Give the camera to someone. Give the phone. Book a photoshoot with your family and be sure to appear in the picture.
You are a part of the family and not just its chronicler.
You deserve to be in your children’s memories, not because you took the photo, but because you were there and loved them with all of your messy, beautiful self.
Last Thoughts: Representation and the Power of Parenting
Victoria Bolduc’s comic strip is more than a funny joke. It’s an inspiring call to action. It encourages us to reflect on the often unsaid dynamics of modern parenthood and sheds light on the invisible work mums do every day.
It also offers a simple fix: give the camera.
Capture the joy of her. Capture the struggle. Take pictures of the quiet moments in between where she is holding it together.
Someday, when your children look at those photos, they will see not only a loving father but also a mother who is strong, present and fiercely dedicated.
It’s worth telling. children’s health.
