America invented glitter sunscreen – please send help!

Sparkle sunscreen

In a development that has already got parents feeling itchy and forlorn, a US company have created a line of sparkly products that will ensure its users have glitter in all those hard to reach places.

Sparkle sunscreen

Honestly, did we really need glitter sunscreen to keep our kiddos protected from the sun? Apparently we did because somebody has made some and we have a lot of questions. We think you might too.

The first thing you are probably thinking about this product is “please, Lord, whyyyyy?” and we get it. But while many are averse to the charms of glitter and often wish to set it on fire, a bling-loving minority feel everything is better with sparkles.

The second thing you might be thinking is “how the heck do you get that stuff off?”

We looked it up and honestly, we don’t know. We think it might be permanent and eventually turn the wearer into an ACTUAL roll of tin foil. (Just joking! We’d suggest your usual bath/warm water would wash this off!)

Problematic?

This SPF50+ sunscreen contains BPA-free plastic glitter and provides 80 minutes of water resistant coverage. It retails for just under $20 a tube. SeaStar Sparkle Sunscreen is made in the USA and comes in pink glitter, gold glitter and rainbow glitter. It’s fragranced like party cakes, mango and berries.

It’s worth noting that this stuff washes into the ocean and waterways. Anything with tiny plastic bits is probably not great for the environment (won’t somebody think of the fish?!). Microplastics are a real disaster for the natural world and our own health, in fact. So there’s that very important issue.

You’ll also probably be finding glitter on your beach towels and swimsuits and boogie boards for the next 187 years. Shudder. But maybe that’s the sparkly sort of person you seek to be.

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