Realities of Your First Date Night After Baby

10 Surprising Realities of Your First Date Night After Baby

1. You Will be Interrupted by Your Baby During Preparation Time

When parents are distracted, babies will tune into their parents. As soon as you begin talking on the telephone, your child will suddenly require something that they did not need when you were paying full attention to them. One of the best things about going out is taking a shower. You get to change out of your trackies into something more comfortable.

Ask your sitter to arrive early and watch your child while you prepare. If this isn’t an option, talk to your partner about a time when they can be ready to take care of the baby while getting dressed. You can then leave the house calmly. You’re probably going to have a little spit-up milk on your shoulders, but you are out of trackies. Winning.

2. You will Enjoy Your Date Night More if You Trust and Know Your Babysitter

It’s a big thing to leave your child for the first time. Your protective instincts have been ingrained since you’ve never left your baby alone at night. You can increase your chances of having a relaxing evening by using a babysitter that you trust. This is an option if you have family members, close friends, or parents who are willing to watch your child while you’re away. You may want to spend time with the hired sitter before the evening so that you feel comfortable and the sitter can get to know your child.

3. Pump and Dump

When you are going out with a baby who is breastfeeding, preparation is essential. Give yourself time to adjust to and express breast milk. Invest in a quality breast pump to make the process easier.

You may find it difficult to choose the right breast pump. A breast pump with a soft cushioned breast and five levels of suction is ideal for comfort and optimal milk flow. If you are planning to go out for a special night, you may want to leave some milk with your babysitter. You can also have extra expressed milk on hand to feed your child during the night. You can then pump, dump, and begin breastfeeding the next day when you return home.

4. Baby Updates: Yay or Nay?

If you feel you would rather have updates about your baby throughout the night than receive them in detail, you can choose to do so. Let your sitter know what you want if you tend to lean towards the latter. Sending you pictures of your child throughout the night may give you peace of mind so you can enjoy your date.

5. Keep Expectations Low

It’s okay if your first night out doesn’t resemble those chilled evenings before the baby. You may look like an adult, but that doesn’t mean you are free of sleep deprivation or the changes from the past few months. It may take a while for you and your partner to think of something to say that’s not about the baby. You and your partner should be able to relax and remember that you will reconnect again over time, even if the topic is different.

6. Be Ready to Feel Emotions

It’s like you’ve always been with your baby, but now it’s just not there. You might feel as if a part of you is missing. Or that you are guilty of leaving. All of this is perfectly normal. You are hormonally attached to your child, and it’s not wrong for her to need you. But she’ll be fine for a couple of hours. If you feel differently you think you should try not to be too hard on yourself. The first time you are away from your child is a big deal.

7. You Could be Home by 8:30 PM

It may not be realistic to expect a long night, despite your cocktail plans. You may want to keep your first evening out with an adult short and sweet. The effects of sleep loss and the effort required to leave the house can be exhausting. It’s okay if you need a few weeks to want to go out after 9 pm.

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8. Probabilities That There Will Not Be Any Sex

But there might not be. There might be, but there may not. You’ve experienced a lot of changes in your body recently. All of this is normal. Sex will be back. Maybe not tonight.

9. You May Not Be Prepared Despite Your Plans

Ignore anyone who tells you that you must go out. Some people will say that it is important for the relationship between you and your partner. While it is true that quality time is needed, it is not going to be fun if you aren’t ready. It’s perfectly fine. You’ll soon know if you and your partner want to go on a date. There’s no need to rush, but if you decide to go, enjoy yourself.

10. Your Baby Will Be a Very Happy Child to See You Again

After spending some time together with your partner and seeing your child again, you will be delighted to see them.

How to Reconnect with Your Partner and Enjoy a Date After Having a Child?

1. What Dating Used to be Like?

Our dates are much shorter and more intimate than they were before we became parents. Dates used to last hours before we had our baby, but now they are shorter. We take time to appreciate the small interactions that we have together. We now enjoy hiking, shopping, family time, and weekend getaways.

2. Plan Everything

Setting a weekly/monthly schedule of dates helps me prioritize our relationship, just as I track the baby’s sleep, diaper changes, and feedings. The schedule should be flexible but firm to reduce stress and give us something to look forward to every week.

3. Date Night is a Great Idea!

Even a romantic night at home can be as romantic as going out. I was hesitant to leave my child, miss a breastfeeding session, and find childcare. Instead of canceling date night, we came up with some creative ideas.

To keep the dates at home, we ordered food from a nearby restaurant, attended a virtual cooking course, had a movie night on our couch, and enjoyed an indoor picnic by the fireplace. Choose a date that works with your child’s schedule. If evenings are difficult because of your baby’s bedtime, consider a morning or an afternoon date.

4. You can ask for Help from Other People

This is a reminder to that it’s okay to ask for assistance. Often, friends and family will be willing to assist you. You just have to ask. You can go on a date, or you can stay at home and have uninterrupted time with your partner.

Keep the first dates short and near the house. This will ease your nerves.

5. Consider a Child-care Swap

After I realized I wasn’t the only one feeling this way, my friend and I decided to do a monthly swap. My husband and I watch her children one night per month so that they can enjoy a romantic evening together. The next month, they will watch our children. It’s a win-win situation for both parties. Our children love playing with their friends, and we enjoy the fact that we can trust our friends.

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6. Staycation

Our mental and physical health improved dramatically after a night of uninterrupted rest. You can ask your parents, siblings, or friends to come and stay the night to watch your child while you book a nearby hotel room. You can leave in the late afternoon or right after your child goes to sleep so that you and your partner can have a romantic dinner, enjoy a relaxing hotel stay, and rekindle your relationship.

When Are You Ready to Leave Your Baby?

When will you be ready for a date? Some moms are ready to go out right away, whether it is for their sense of well-being, the health of their relationship, or whatever else. Some moms wait until their doctor gives them the all-clear after six weeks, especially if it is a difficult birth or a C-section. Some moms wait until their baby can reliably take a bottle or sleep through the night. This could be anywhere between three months and (ahem!) Three years.

Ask Yourself These Questions When You Are Planning a Date:

1. What is your baby’s personality?
   Easy-going babies are easier to leave with others. Fussy babies? Not at all. Date night may have to be postponed if your baby is crying non-stop or if your child doesn’t seem to be attached to you like a koala.
2. Are you able to trust a babysitter?
   You’ll need someone to help you with your baby, whether it’s your grandmother, a neighbor, or someone from a service. This person should have experience in caring for babies and know when to call (and when not).
3. What is your definition of a date night?
   You might want and deserve a three-hour-long meal in a five-star hotel. You may not be able to fully enjoy a three-hour meal at a five-star restaurant.
4. How much time can you leave your baby without you?
   Dates will be shorter if you exclusively breastfeed. Your leash will be longer if the baby is using a bottle.

When Can We Go Out on Our First Date Night After the Baby’s Birth?

My husband and I went to the nearby vintage cinema for a Mediterranean meal and then watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. We didn’t bother to check the running time, so after 2 hours and 46 minutes, my breasts had engorged.

She was older than a year at the time. My local mom’s club helped us find a babysitter for a date. She was a young, part-time actress who had a lot of experience with babies more than I did and was fast asleep when I arrived home with a book resting on her chest. I was annoyed that she didn’t stay on the edge of my daughter’s crib to watch her every breath. I also felt that I had spent over $100 in addition to mediocre food, and $40 for movie tickets, all of which were to a boring B- B-movie that lasted forever.

Why is Date Night Important After Having a Child?

Parenthood can bring new challenges to a relationship. According to research, relationship quality usually declines when a couple has their first child. Parenthood brings new challenges and identities.

Research has shown, however, that couples who prioritize date nights regularly experience significant benefits. Date nights with young children can reduce the chances of a couple splitting by up to 20%. Date nights are also more likely to lead to a higher level of life satisfaction for couples.

Date nights can help couples strengthen their relationship, improve communication and better navigate the challenges that come with parenthood.

These date ideas for parents will help you celebrate your love this Valentine’s Day and find joy again.