Mum upset her mother-in-law took baby out without permission

Posted in Relationships.

When a new baby arrives it can be hard to establish boundaries with some family members. Sometimes they’re so besotted with the little one they want to take every opportunity to talk about them, advise on them and spend time with them.

Overly sensitive or fair enough?

One mum has taken to parenting forum Mumsnet, wondering if she’s overreacting to her mother-in-law’s behaviour with her baby.

“I’m not sure whether I’m being overly sensitive about it,” she admitted explaining that her mother-in-law visits every few weeks, but notes that she’s not super familiar with the baby.

“Earlier today she was in the house playing with the baby,” the mum writes. “I popped upstairs for a few minutes. Next thing I hear is the front door shut. I look outside the window and see her walking down the street with the baby in the pram and the dog.”

“She hadn’t told us she was going out, she had my handbag in the pram and the dog hadn’t even got his collar on.”

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“Just going for a walk”

The mum quickly spoke to her partner about it and he called his mum and asked her to return home. The mother-in-law then explained that she was “just going for a walk, couldn’t find the dog collar so didn’t put it on and knew my handbag was in there but didn’t think much of it.”

“She doesn’t seem to think it’s weird to just take my 5-month-old baby away from me without telling me,” the mum continued wondering if she was making something out of nothing or was right to be upset.

Commenters on Mumsnet were quick to weigh in with a variety of reactions and a lot of them were furious.

“I would be absolutely livid,” one mum blazed. “This is totally unacceptable and any trust I had in her would be gone. There is no excuse for what she’s done and I wouldn’t have her back in my home, quite frankly.” #Gosh.

Woman sad negative upset

“Sneaking out”

Rather than assume the mother-in-law was trying to do a good deed and surprise her daughter-in-law with some alone time, plenty of commenters said this was all part of an evil master plan.

“That’s so not OK. What an odd entitled thoughtless thing to do,” one person wrote. “She was obviously sneaking out, otherwise she would have waited five minutes and asked you where the dog collar was.”

Some people thought it was pretty unfair that the mother-in-law was getting absolutely crucified for taking the baby (and yes … the dog and the bag) out.

“Not sure why it’s such a big problem. She’s the baby’s grandmother, why shouldn’t she take her grandchild around the block in the pram?” one woman posted.

Other people were more worried about the dog.

“Taking baby, fine,” another suggested. “Taking the dog without being fully in control of him, not okay.”

dog and lead

Complicated context

“If she had actually had the decency to ask, I would’ve let her go out with them (obviously without my handbag, and with the dog appropriately dressed!)” the mum – who also noted there had been some other issues between her and her MIL – explained in a follow-up comment.

“I’m not possessive about the baby but considering the baby even can’t walk, crawl, talk yet, I really would like to know where she is at all times.”

That seems totally fair.


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