James Van Der Beek dishes out some relationship advice and it’s spot on
Dawson’s Creek star James Van Der Beek is married with five children, so it’s safe to say he and his wife know a thing or two about what does and doesn’t work when it comes to their relationship.
James and his wife, Kimberly, are parents to five gorgeous mini-me kiddos – eight-year-old Olivia, seven-year-old Joshua, five-year-old Annabel, three-year-old Emilia and 11-month-old Gwendolyn, who was born at home in June last year. The couple married in Israel back in 2010 and have obviously been thick as thieves, building their beautiful family ever since.
“Relationships are not so much about who you are when you met”
Taking to Instagram, James shared with his fans a spot-on piece of relationship advice.
“Sometimes we fight. We bicker. We go to bed angry, usually over stupid stuff that doesn’t really matter but somehow does at the moment. We don’t post all that on IG because, well… we like being married,” he writes. “But the one thing that seems pretty clear so far is that relationships are not so much about who you are – or who you were when you met – but how you evolve.”
Deep – we know, but stay with us …
James goes on to explain that it was actually his wife who came up with this next gem, but it makes total sense to us.
“It’s important to afford your partner room to change. To not define them by their past actions, or tendencies, or even current limitations, because that puts them in a box which may not allow space for a better, more fully realized version of themselves to take root.
“But pairing up with another flawed human (myself excluded, obviously- I’m perfect) means, in no small way, to transcend science. To love, care, and evolve beyond logic. And to allow your partner to do the same.
“And to always put the toilet seat down.”
“I love what you guys pointed out”
The response to the post has been positive with many praising the dad for his “beautiful words”.
“I love what you guys pointed out,” said one commenter. “There is so much importance to what you just said in your post.”
Another wrote: “I absolutely love this. Beautiful words that apply directly to marriage, as well as relationships with your children and close friends. Thank you for sharing!”
“Just read this and is so beautiful and true. I’m not married yet but this describes my 10-year relationship. Change is not easy to accept but that’s what life is about and being able to discover that in a love union is a blessing, room to grow at all stages of life… alone and together.”
Of course, your partner, husband or wife isn’t going to be exactly the same person they were when you first met – especially after having children – the key is giving each other the space to grow, change and evolve together into the best possible versions of yourself.
Well said, James and Kimberly – especially that last part.
