“Mum, have I cleaned my teeth?”
“Yep, you did!”
Five minutes later…
“Mummy, are my teeth shiny? Did I clean them properly?”
“Yes, honey. You already asked me, remember?”
And then, like a loop stuck on repeat, the same question resurfaces — not once or twice, but 15 more times before breakfast is even on the table.
If this scene sounds familiar, you’re not alone. It’s something many parents have quietly wondered about, especially when the questions and rituals start to feel… more than just a phase. You might be asking yourself: Is this normal kid behaviour, or could my child have obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)?
In this post, we’ll explore what OCD looks like in children, how to tell the difference between typical worries and something more serious, and most importantly, how you can support your child with empathy, understanding, and actionable steps.
What Is OCD? : Understanding OCD
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition that affects people of all ages, including kids. At its core, OCD is made up of two parts:
- Obsessions: unwanted, intrusive thoughts, fears, or images that cause distress or anxiety.
- Compulsions: repetitive behaviours or mental acts performed in response to those obsessions, often as a way to ease the discomfort.
Children with OCD may know their thoughts or actions don’t make a lot of sense, but that doesn’t stop the intense anxiety that compels them to act anyway. And it’s not something they can easily “just stop doing.” To them, these behaviours feel urgent and necessary.
Imagine an itch you can’t scratch, an internal pressure that doesn’t go away until something is done “just right.” That’s how it feels for a child with OCD.
Common Obsessions in Kids with OCD
Obsessions are not simply little worries or fleeting thoughts—they’re persistent, often irrational, and usually upsetting. A child might get stuck on a particular fear or thought that loops in their mind all day long.
Here are a few common types of obsessions children might experience:
- Fear of germs, dirt, or illness — worrying excessively about getting sick or causing someone else to fall ill.
- Fear of harm — being overly concerned that they or a loved one will get hurt, die, or be in danger.
- Fear of mistakes — being terrified of getting something wrong, even small things like homework formatting.
- Order and symmetry — feeling distressed if objects are not in a specific order or aligned “just right.”
- Taboo or intrusive thoughts — these may include unwanted ideas or mental images that feel scary or wrong to the child.
- Superstitious beliefs — associating numbers, colours, or actions with luck or danger.
Even if your child understands that these thoughts don’t make logical sense, they might feel powerless to stop thinking about them.
What Do OCD Compulsions Look Like?
To soothe their distress, children with OCD perform compulsions, repetitive behaviours or mental rituals designed to prevent the feared outcome or relieve anxiety.
These behaviours may include:
- Repeated hand-washing or cleaning, even when already clean.
- Asking the same questions over and over to gain reassurance.
- Repeating actions, such as walking through a doorway multiple times, touching things in a specific pattern, or redoing tasks.
- Checking repeatedly, making sure lights are off, doors are locked, or that an assignment is complete.
- Mental compulsions like silently repeating a phrase or counting to a certain number to ward off bad things.
To a parent, these rituals might look quirky or puzzling. But to the child, they often feel like life-or-death necessities. Not completing a ritual can lead to a surge of anxiety, tears, or even meltdowns.
OCD vs. Normal Kid Worries: How Can You Tell?
Let’s be honest—kids worry. They might get nervous before a spelling test, cry if they lose a toy, or demand their sandwich be cut into perfect triangles. So, how do you know when worry crosses the line into something more concerning?
Here are a few ways OCD differs from typical childhood anxiety or quirks:
1. Persistence and Intensity
OCD thoughts and behaviours are chronic and time-consuming. If your child is spending an hour brushing their teeth, checking their bag, or avoiding certain cracks in the sidewalk, it’s more than a fleeting worry.
2. Compulsions as a Coping Mechanism
Unlike general anxiety, kids with OCD often develop rigid rituals to prevent bad outcomes. These compulsions become essential in their minds to “keep things safe.”
3. Distress When Routines Are Disrupted
Kids with OCD can become extremely upset if they can’t complete a ritual the “right” way. Meltdowns, panic, or a refusal to move forward with their day are common.
4. Impact on Daily Life
OCD often interferes with school, play, relationships, and family routines. It’s not just a minor inconvenience—it can disrupt every part of your child’s day.
The Emotional Toll: What OCD Feels Like for a Child
One of the most heartbreaking aspects of OCD is how isolating and frustrating it can be for the child. They might know something feels off, but they can’t explain why. They may feel embarrassed, confused, or afraid of getting into trouble.
Some common emotional and behavioural challenges that can tag along with OCD include:
- Difficulty concentrating at school due to obsessive thoughts.
- Increased irritability or moodiness, often from the pressure of keeping up with rituals.
- Trouble making decisions or expressing preferences.
- Prolonged routines — like taking 45 minutes to put on socks just the right way.
- Strong reactions to changes in plans or “imperfect” results.
OCD can also co-exist with other conditions, such as ADHD, autism spectrum disorder, anxiety, or Tourette’s syndrome, which is why a proper diagnosis from a trained professional is so important.
What Should You Do If You Suspect OCD?
As a parent, your instinct may be to reassure, accommodate, or even dismiss the behaviours in hopes they’ll pass. But if you suspect your child might be dealing with OCD, taking gentle but proactive steps can make all the difference.
1. Open Up the Conversation
Start by gently naming what you’re noticing.
You might say something like:
“I’ve noticed you seem really worried about making sure your shoes are lined up a certain way every night. It looks like it’s making you feel stressed. Want to tell me about it?”
The goal is to come from a place of curiosity and compassion, not judgment. Let your child know you’re on their team.
2. Visit Your GP or Pediatrician
Your doctor can help assess whether a referral is needed for a mental health specialist. They’ll also rule out any other medical concerns that might be contributing to your child’s behaviours.
3. Ask for a Psychological Evaluation
If OCD is suspected, your child may be referred to a child psychologist or psychiatrist who can conduct an evaluation using age-appropriate tools.
Remember, an accurate diagnosis is crucial for receiving the right support.
How Is Childhood OCD Treated?
Treatment for OCD can be very effective, and the earlier it’s caught, the better the outcome.
Here are the two primary types of treatment:
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
This is the gold standard treatment for OCD, particularly a form of CBT called Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP).
In therapy, kids learn to:
- Understand their OCD and recognise how it works.
- Practice facing their fears in small, manageable steps.
- Resist the urge to do compulsions, gradually weakening the OCD “cycle.”
ERP is gentle but powerful. Over time, children gain confidence and realise that nothing bad happens when they don’t give in to OCD’s demands.
Medication
In some cases, especially when OCD is severe or not improving with therapy alone, doctors may prescribe SSRI (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor) medications, which help regulate anxiety and intrusive thoughts.
Always discuss the pros and cons with a qualified pediatric psychiatrist.
How You Can Support Your Child at Home
Even while you’re waiting for an appointment or starting treatment, there are ways you can help your child feel safe and understood:
- Stay calm and patient — Your child is not trying to be difficult. They’re battling something that feels very real to them.
- Avoid giving constant reassurance — While it feels helpful in the moment, it often feeds the OCD cycle. Instead, help them tolerate the uncertainty.
- Learn about OCD together — Reading books, watching videos, or drawing out feelings can help make OCD feel less scary or shameful.
- Celebrate small wins — If your child skips a ritual or tries something new, acknowledge the courage it took.
- Stay connected with school staff — Teachers and counsellors can offer insight and support during the school day.
Final Thoughts: There’s Hope
Watching your child struggle with OCD can feel overwhelming, confusing, and even heartbreaking. You may wonder if this will always be the case.
But here’s the good news: OCD is treatable. With the right support both clinical and emotional your child can learn to manage their symptoms, gain confidence, and enjoy the carefree moments of childhood again
