Hands To Themselves? Why Toddlers are Terrible at Social Distancing
Stand 1.5 metres apart.
Avoid large gatherings.
Replace handshakes with foot tappings.
We’ve been taught these mantras of public health during flu and pandemic seasons, particularly when a serious virus like COVID-19 spreads through our communities. We adapt as adults. We grumble, sanitize, and grumble again, but we comply. If you are a parent of a toddler or a preschooler, then you have probably repeated a very real and very frustrating thought.
You are not alone. You are not alone. It’s completely understandable. Social distancing, a concept that is abstract and deeply adult, is rooted in self-control, long-term planning, and respect for hidden health risks.
Toddlers, in contrast, live in a world that is delightfully–and sometimes horrifyingly–tangible. Touch, noise, motion, and sharing are all ways that toddlers express their relationships. When the government tells your child to stay away from his or her best friend in daycare, or to not touch public surfaces at random, your inner monologue is likely to sound something like “Cool Story.” Let me know what happens with my 3-year-old, who just licked an escalator handrail.
We’ll explore the hilarious, exasperating, and unapologetic ways toddlers and preschoolers fail to disengage from others. We’ll also give parents some practical solutions that may (just could) be helpful.
1. The Tigger Syndrome: Hugging with Excessive Enthusiasm
You just finished a 15-minute presentation on how to avoid getting too close. You have practiced, used toys to illustrate, and perhaps even role-played. You send your child to the park or daycare, hoping that everything will be okay.
You can hear the joyous squeal from the other side of the playground. Two little besties are locked in a stare. It looks like a romantic comedy. They run. They run. They embrace.
“Noooo! “No cuddles !” you shout in vain as their chubby hands wrap around each other like koalas holding on to an eucalyptus.
Children love physical affection. Children communicate their friendship and connection by hugging, holding hands, and climbing on each other. What’s the problem? This is the exact opposite of social distancing.
While it is adorable to watch toddlers display affection in such a way, it can also be a nightmare if you are trying to prevent the spread of germs.
Tip:
Introduce “air hugs” or “heartwaves” as new ways to say “hello”. Tell them it’s only a game for a short time. Have fun. Play is the best way to teach toddlers!
2. Share Lollipops And Sippy Cups Because… Ew
It’s an especially horrifying sight to see your child happily swapping a lollipop with another kid.
They act as if their sticky, slobbery Popsicle was a gift for the world. Sharing is an important developmental milestone. We’d prefer they not display their progress so generously when it comes to food, cups, or anything else they’ve eaten.
You confiscate the sugar stick and declare, “No more lollipops!” You’re losing the battle. These kids treat bodily liquids as stickers that can be traded.
What about during the flu season, or even worse, even during a pandemic?c. This kind of sharing would make any adult want a hazmat outfit.
Tip:
A story or puppet show can reinforce the concept of “personal snacks” as well as “germ boundaries.” Young kids respond surprisingly well to imaginary characters–especially if you create a villain like “Sneaky Germy George.”
3. Vomit – A Parent’s Unexpected Accessory
You have the bowl prepared. You have covered the couch in towels. You’re prepared.
Your toddler will always choose you to be the target of their vomit.
No matter how many plastic or sick bags you throw in their direction, when the stomach bug hits, your shirt will become the official splash area. It’s like a law.
While social distancing technically is applicable during illness, it’s not the case when you are in your child’s comfort zone. In their little minds, if your child is sick, you need to be closer and not farther away.
It’s good. It’s a necessary thing. It makes hygiene management… let’s say, complicated.
Tip:
Think layers when illness strikes, both for you and your partner. You should always have wipes, sanitizer, and an extra set of clothes on hand. Don’t berate yourself for the mess. It’s parenting. It’s messy.
4. Drag Each other Around Like Tiny Wrestlers
You gently remind your child, “1.5 metres apart” as you walk to daycare.
You turn around thirty seconds later, and they’re dragging their friend across the floor as if it were a toddler rodeo. It’s sometimes the hand. It can be the hand. Sometimes it’s your ankle.
If you suggest that they stop, your suggestion is met with innocent, wide-eyed eyes, and an incredibly sincere “But I Love Them!”
Well, sure. In the face of a contagious disease, love should be confined to a six-foot area.
This kind of physical play and roughhousing is normal. This is how children form bonds, learn to cooperate, and get rid of the energy they create out of thin air.
Safe play looks different when there is a global risk to health.
Tip:
Introduce new games that are spaced out: shadow tag, where no touching is allowed. Follow-the-leader using distance rules or dance-offs are all great alternatives. Offer alternative activities that are still fun, but minimize physical contact.
5. Licking everything in Sight
The greatest mystery in the mind of a toddler is the need to lick objects.
Park benches. Shopping the floor. The wall. The floor. Their shoes.
They treat the world as if it were a popsicle. While we can expect babies to explore the world with their mouths as they grow, toddlers are supposed to have moved on.
Some days? Some days you just can’t help them.
It’s not only that they lick things, but they do it always when you’re turned away. You’re speaking to another parent one second. Next, you scream, “DON’T LIKE THE DOOR HANDLE!” as if you were auditioning for horror movies.
Tip:
Use wipes, sanitizer, and simple rewards to encourage “no-licking”. Use humor, images, or “germ-spy” games where the children have to find things that they should not touch.
What Do Parents Do?
It’s important to remember, however, that the children are not “bad”; they are simply being developmentally suitable.
There are some ways we can help toddlers learn about hygiene, safety, and personal space. It will not be perfect. It can still be effective.
1. Handwashing Can Be Fun and Frequent
Make hand washing a game. You can use songs, such as singing “Happy Birthday” two times or creating your silly jingle. Use soaps with vibrant colors and lather to make them proud of their clean, hygienic hands. Visual timers can help, too.
2. Avoid Crowded Indoor Centres and Playgrounds
Playdates should be held in less crowded open-air areas. Alternatives to crowded play centres include quiet parks, nature walks, or backyards. Indoor play centres can be like germ buffets. It is best to avoid them when there are outbreaks.
3. Teach “Wave instead of a hug” Greetings
You can make this one more normal by modeling yourself. You can show them by doing so. Make it silly: dance, wave, or blow kisses.
4. Use Sanitizer for Daycare Dropoffs and Pickups
Make it a habit to sanitize your hands when you enter and leave the childcare center, even if they have hygiene protocols. Let your child spray a pump in your hand and vice versa. Make your child a part of the ritual.
5. After Child Care, Wash Their Hands and Clothes
Dress your child in the same manner as you would treat his hands, especially if he has been with others. After daycare, change them into “home clothing”. Throw the worn-out outfit into the washing machine.
6. Keep Sick Kids at Home
It’s important to always follow this standard procedure, but it is even more so in the current environment. Even mild symptoms are cause for caution. This is a great opportunity to teach your child the importance of staying at home.
7. Information to Empower Older Children
Distancing your child and promoting hygiene is important if they are old enough to understand cause and effect. Use empowering language. Use empowering language.
“Is a powerful word.
Conclusion
The lessons of social distancing and hygiene, as well as virus awareness, are not a one-time thing. These are conversations that continue to evolve. You won’t raise a germ-savvy five-year-old overnight. It’s fine.
You are showing up. You’re trying. You are explaining, demonstrating, and redirecting. You are cleaning. Even if your toddler licks their dog’s bowl after you have just washed their hands, you are doing the job.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. When you can, laugh. Sanitize only when necessary. You can be sure that your child, one day, will have better impulse control and a few funny memories about the times they “shared” lollipops with everyone they met.
Deep breaths in the meantime. You might also want to buy an extra bottle of hand sanitizer.
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