4 Simple Ways to Foster Equality Within Your Family
On March 8 every year, the world takes a moment to celebrate International Women’s Day. This global celebration recognizes the achievements and advancements of women and girls around the globe. Social media and news platforms are flooded with inspirational stories, powerful pictures, and calls to continue advocating for women’s rights for 24 hours. Yes, it’s a celebration, but it’s also a time to reflect and take action.
The theme for 2020 International Women’s Day, I am Generation Equality, reminds us all that we have a part to play, not just in the grand arenas of politics and social life, but also within our families and homes. It’s important to recognize the struggles women and girls face around the world, from wage gaps to systemic discrimination and violence. But it is also crucial to start this fight at home.
What better place is there to teach, model, and nurture the values of equality, fairness, and respect than the places where children learn about the world and grow up?
As the website for International Women’s Day points out, we are all individually responsible for our thoughts and actions, all day long. This includes actively challenging stereotypes, addressing bias, and celebrating both boys’ and girls’ achievements.
If you’d like to contribute to this important cause, then here are four practical and simple ways to promote gender equity within your family. These strategies do not require big gestures, but rather everyday choices that have a profound impact on the next generation.
1. Encourage Kids to Be Themselves–Unapologetically
Children are bombarded with messages, both explicit and subliminal, about how to behave according to their gender. Toys and colors, activities and clothing, even friendships, are framed by stereotypes. Trucks for boys and dolls for girls; blue and pink for boys; rough and tough or gentle and nurturing.
Children should be able to be themselves, without being burdened by outdated gender expectations.
Encourage your child’s interests. If your son likes to play with dolls or paint, encourage him. If your daughter prefers to race cars or climb trees, encourage her. Instead of directing them towards “gender appropriate” toys or activities, celebrate their choices. Children develop emotional resilience and confidence when they are allowed to be themselves.
It is also important to be aware of the marketing tactics used for toys and other activities. Many stores still have a divided toy aisle by gender. This sends the message that girls and boys belong in different boxes. Consider buying toys that your child enjoys, regardless of whether they are typically “for boys or “for girls”.
Why does this matter?
Children who don’t feel constrained by gender stereotypes have better social and emotional skills. They are less likely to have rigid and limiting beliefs on what they can or cannot do and are more likely to pursue their passions. You can help raise confident, well-rounded adults by encouraging individuality.
2. Do not Stereotype Gender in Any Way, Especially When it Comes to Household Roles
Children are most likely to internalize and observe gender roles in the home. Kids watch their parents as they do the cleaning, cooking, and childcare. Children notice which children are praised as “strong”, “helpful”, and those who are expected to be quiet or “obedient”.
It’s time for a load-sharing. Everyone, regardless of gender, should be able to:
- Throw out your garbage
- Cook dinner
- Wash dishes
- How to fix a broken chair
- Fold your laundry
- Help for younger siblings
Children internalize the idea that chores are not gender-specific when they see their parents and caregivers share them fairly. It normalizes the notion that men and women can do a variety of jobs, and breaks down stereotypes.
Why is this important? Gender Stereotyping begins at an incredibly young age. Children as young as 3 years old can mimic and pick up on sexist behaviors, even before they understand the meaning. These little eyes are constantly watching and learning.
Consider involving your children in the decision-making process for household duties. Make chores fun by adding music or rewards. Also, celebrate teamwork over competition. This promotes not only equality but also cooperation and responsibility.
3. The Words We Use Can Shape Our Beliefs
The language we use shapes the way we perceive ourselves, others, and even the world. It is so easy to use phrases that reinforce gender stereotyping without realizing it. Phrases such as:
- “Boys are boys.”
- You’re a beautiful princess.
- “Man up.”
- “Girls do better than boys at… (insert stereotype)”
The words may seem innocent or even affectionate, but the messages they convey limit what children can be and do.
You can use the following language instead:
- Describe the child’s intelligence, kindness, creativity, and curiosity.
- Avoid labeling your child as “bossy,” too loud, or “too emotionally” based on gender.
- When relatives or friends are making stereotypical or unfair comments, call them out (politely and firmly).
- Praise children for their courage, empathy, and perseverance.
Instead of saying, “He is strong like a male,” you can say, “He is really strong.”
You may be wondering if this makes any difference. The answer is yes. According to developmental psychology, children take cues from adults that influence their perceptions of “normality”. These impressions impact their self-esteem and aspirations.
This is a great tip: If your relatives or friends use stereotypical language or make assumptions based on stereotypes, share articles or resources (like this blog!) with them. Explaining why language is important. We can better create inclusive environments for children if we all understand each other.
4. Open Conversations Build Awareness
Modeling equality and using inclusive language are vital, but conversations–especially age-appropriate, honest ones–are where deep understanding grows.
Discuss with your children about fairness, respect, and their strengths. Asking questions to encourage reflection and empathy is a great way to get your kids thinking.
- What do you enjoy most about yourself?
- How do you feel when someone tells you that boys cannot cry?
- Why do you believe it is important that everyone has the same opportunities?
- What can we do when we witness someone being treated unfairly due to their gender?
Maintain a curious and compassionate tone. It’s not a “gender-equality talk” that happens once, but a dialogue that continues as your child grows.
Model and promote gender equality.” Promote gender equality .” By modeling and promoting it, you can help children understand the importance of equality.
These conversations are even more important for teenagers as they deal with peer pressure, social media, and identity formation. Openness and accessibility about these issues help teens feel confident and supported to fight inequality in their lives.
Why Gender Equality in the Family Matters Beyond the Home
can help shape the society of the future by creating an equal environment in your home. Children who grow up in a fair and respectful home are more likely:
- Promote equal rights at school, in the workplace, and within your community.
- Respectful relationships are the foundation of healthy relationships.
- Reject stereotypes that are harmful and discriminatory.
- As you grow, develop into an adult who values diversity and inclusion.
Boys and men also benefit from gender equality, as they are freed from stereotypes that can restrict their emotional expression and career options. Fairness benefits everyone when it is the basis.
Small Steps Make a Big Impact
It may seem like a minor part of a larger global movement, but it is one of the most important.
You can help create a world that is more equal and just by encouraging your children to be themselves. Avoiding stereotypes, selecting words carefully, a nd having honest discussions are all ways you can do this.
This International Women’s Day, let’s not only celebrate the incredible women and girls around the world, but also begin at home. Because no matter how small the action is, it helps create a world where children are free to be themselves.
