First comes love, then come marriage, then comes baby in the baby carriage… well, not quite. It’s a playground tune that’s well and truly out of date, when we consider that more and more single women in their 30s are turning to IVF, to have children on their own.
Nadine heard her biological clock ticking loud and clear, when at the age of 38 her doctor advised her she needed to have a child sooner rather than later. But the Bondi interior designer was single. According to News Corp Australia, Nadine felt she would regret putting her love life ahead of her desire to have a family.
“I had the rest of my life to find the right man, but I didn’t have the rest of my life to have a child,” she says.
Nadine is now the proud mum of 18-month-old Talia.
“It is without doubt the best thing I have ever done, yes the scariest, but the most rewarding — it’s been an amazing journey and as difficult as it is, she makes everything better, I’ve never regretted it in any way.”
IVF Australia medical director Peter Illingsworth says this is becoming a familiar story. He says the number of single women seeking treatment at his clinic has doubled in the past five years.
IVF Australia says up to 50 people are added to its wait list for sperm donors each month, with about half of those single women.
“It’s becoming more socially acceptable for women to do this — 20 to 30 years ago, women would never have done this because of the social stigma of it all, but there is a growing awareness that this is a very reasonable decision to make,” says Dr Illingworth.
Melbourne’s Jodi Howell felt she had little choice than to go it alone, after her relationship ended.
“I didn’t want to miss out on being a mum and my age was going to force my hand,” Jodi says. “And I didn’t want to go have to go through six months of getting to know someone, only to find out they didn’t want kids.”
She was also 38 when she started her single journey to parenthood, and last year had Jaxon, saying she was, “terrified, happy, excited and scared all at the same time”.
Jodi is considering giving Jaxon a brother or sister, and she’s encouraging other single women heading towards their 40s to take the plunge.
“I would tell them don’t hold back because there is nothing like being a mum, that joy of holding a newborn boy or girl at that very first moment, nothing else matters.”
Many women are keen to know their options, according to Fertility Society of Australia president Mark Bowman.
“It’s women in their late 30s and early 40s. A woman’s fertility is in decline at that point and two things happen: you finally get sick of the right guy not showing up and you get yourself financially secure with respect to housing and your career.”
(via News Corp Australia)