Things are not always as they seem in the beautifully-styled world of Instagram, and Australian mum Rachelle Rowlings is more than happy to reveal the warts-and-all stories behind her pretty pics.
My so-called glossy life
Not only is Rachelle lifting the lid on her perfectly-imperfect life, she’s bringing her adorable and wise-faced baby boy to the table. (Really, look at his face! He is all-knowing and super-cute! So wise!)
If you’re a speedy scroller on Instagram, you might assume that life at Chez Rowlings is all gloss and snazz.
But dig a bit deeper and read the captions and you’ll discover that not only is there an ongoing Battle of the Boob/thigh chafing challenge at Rachelle’s place, but that she also has a very, very deep-seated love of emojis.
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As I graciously accept my 'Lifetime achievement award for Mothering' I feel I'd have to admit to today 🏆 5 seconds into 'free willy' time, LC abruptly shit out an entire creak of Thai green curry 🍲 He literally self combusted … It was a mango & broccoli graveyard 💥And suspiciously like he'd stashed a butter chicken in his cot last night 🤔 By the time it ended he was like a charcoal chicken & because it dries quicker than cement – he was actually rock hard ✊🏼 Apparently he's the Picasso of poo because there was a post modern movement across the whole floor, wall & his entire 10 kilos of skin 👻 I digested the situation for 3 minutes, pondering whether to call 000 or to just throw him out and get a new one 👋🏼 Instead we showered fully clothed, 3 layers of Bondi Sands & the last of my dignity down the drain. And left with a '50 shades of brown' bath tub 💩 I put him out to dry in the sun while I sent photos of it to everyone in my contacts list 📸 Cheers 👍🏼 #istillsmellofturd #ithinkitsimmynasalcavity #thatshitdoesntwashout #literally … This hat though 🎩 @monamourstyle 💯✔️
While many of us spend these early days of parenting sporting mum-buns and mysteriously stained yoga pants, Rachelle’s aiming higher.
She’s squishing herself into high-fashion, small planes and teetering heels, providing a healthy dose of aspiration, without being a faker pain in the butt about it.
As mum life throws the usual bodily-fluid-themed challenges her way, Rachelle will fight on and capture herself dressed completely in white with perfectly tousled hair (before some kind of baby biohazard reminds her that disaster WILL strike at any time, if you let your guard down.)
The struggle is real
If you’re a mum who’s trying to maintain some semblance of presentability, or you just want to reminisce about the days when you used to be able to do your pants up, Rachelle’s Insta might provide you with the inspiration/throwback chortles you need.
Not only does it remind us that it’s quite nice to brush our hair, now and again, it perfectly captures the sometimes terrifying tension between being a mum and being a lucid, nicely-turned-out person.
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Reasons why Lord Commander had a tantrum today 👇🏼 🌟I wouldn't let him eat his nappy. 🌟He couldn't get to my nipple through my shirt. 🌟I wouldn't let him lick the dog. 🌟I pulled his hand away from the Foxtel box. 🌟I put his teether in my mouth. 🌟He farted and scared himself. 🌟It was too bright outside. 🌟I didn't let him roll off the change table. 🌟I wouldn't let him have any of my seared salmon salad. 🌟He couldn't grab water. 🌟I stopped him violently playing with his penis. 🌟I cut his Guinness World record nails. 🌟I changed the channel. 🌟I wouldn't let him suck on my ponytail. 🌟My phone light turned off. 🌟He couldn't see the dog. 🌟I wouldn't let him chew my toenails. 🌟I sang along to 'Paw Patrol'. 🌟He poked himself in the eye with his spoon. 🌟He got sweet potato in his nostril. 🌟I wouldn't let him put sand in my eyeball. If you need me I'll be hiding in the closest. #thiskid #ithoughtiwashighmaintenance #gotnothingonthecommander #shit #pleasestopcopyingtheseemma #getyourownmaterialdarl 😘