7 Nuts-and-bolts Things New Parents Will Do
Being a parent can be likened to discovering a new dimension of reality, one filled with spit-ups, sleeplessness, loud noises, and surprises. Amid all this chaos and joy, an interesting thing happens: behaviors that once seemed strange now seem normal — even funny.
Bring home a child and you’ll have to rewrite your rules about privacy, sanity, and social grace. Being “baby-conscious,” before feeling self-conscious, is the first step to overcoming embarrassing moments. You embrace the madness and let go of judgment. Thankfully, those around you are willing to forgive (or even join in) your insanity.
This article will take you on a journey through seven hilariously relatable things that new parents do. It includes the reasons behind each of them, as well as why you should join the club.
1. At 7:00 am, You Can Experience a Broadway-level Performance
Imagine: a darkened room, a snoring child, and you launching into a version of Wheels on the Bus. The standard verses are accompanied by 14 custom additions. You are doing arm motions to represent wipers and squats to represent motors. Then you suddenly start singing “The mummy says I love you, too, all through the town!” You’re performing as if it were the West End.
What? Yes. Why? The silly singing ritual is effective. Toddlers and babies will respond by smiling, laughing, or even joining in. This kind of joyous interaction is worth the slight embarrassment and vocal strain for many parents.
These performances also create connections, encourage early language acquisition, and make for cherished memories. Bizarre? Absolutely. What is the difference between effective and heartwarming? Yes.
2. Waiting for Nap Time in an Underground Carpark
The magic of car hum and engine noise to soothe babies is quickly learned by new parents. While scrolling through your phone, reading a book, or taking a break, you’ll be sitting in your car with the engine off, the heater on, and lights dimmed. You feel triumphant after 45 minutes of silence… until you notice that passers-by stare at you in the parking structure aisles.
Why do you do it? A napping baby is freedom. It’s much better than swinging or pacing through the halls. It’s worth the odd looks. You can maximize nap time in a contained, safe space.
3. How to Become a Shush Master
This is the next level. You will instinctively quiet down noisy birds in the park, whispering toddlers in the next room, and even newborns who are breathing differently. Start small: “Shhh, Daddy, Shhh.” Quiet!”
You’ll be berating strangers in no time for their excessive volume. Is this magpie too loud? To protect your nap, you’ll need to call in the family, friends, and even the dog.
It’s no paranoia, it’s a reaction. Early on, silence is gold, and every sound becomes a potential crisis. Your “shush, becomes a superhero cape.
4. Embrace Olympic-Style Parenting Sprints
Forget leisurely parenting. Babies change their naps every few hours, and food does not cook itself. You’ll sprint–literally–from cot to kitchen to bathroom to nursery, all within seconds.
Pop a play mat down? Run to pee. Set the baby down? Prepare snacks. Run back to check on the bub. It’s intense exercise… and it works wonders to lose post-baby fat. It’s survival, i.e., multitasking and being on alert.
Parenthood sprinting helps you build stamina and tells you stories about how you overcame hunger, bladder emergencies, a n a flailing infant, all at the same time.
5. Watch Dad Fail At Multitasking (And Laugh)
(Or vice-versa.) You will see your partner trying to do multiple things at once while caring for the baby, such as rocking a stroller and answering texts. The baby is alarmingly responsive to every vibration or bounce. Phone? Gone. What news episode would you like to watch? Finish before you blink.
Multitasking is difficult for parents with newborns. Some manage to listen to podcasts in one ear, but it’s hard. Dad will learn the hard way that you can’t do email-and-baby or scrolling-and-rocking. One sneeze from the monitor or splash will cause the baby to bolt upright.
You will gain something invaluable: a sense of humor and an understanding that parenting can be a team effort… complete with some hilarious bloopers around the halfway point.
6. It’s Now Normal to Wear Stained Clothing
Remember when you dressed up to come home? The pre-baby days were all about clean lines and a polished look. You’re now nursing and wearing your long forgotten meal. Splotches of your toddler’s food, spit up, and baby pee become a part of you.
You will dress your partner in a “public” outfit that looks like it has been ruined by food, wrinkles, and stains. He’s wearing grocery store pants, a stinky shirshirtnd a ragtag T-shirt withauce stains. Both of you are living proof that fashion is thrown out the window when survival takes priority.
You’ll laugh and cry at the same time, sharing a shock-and-laugh photo with your friends. “We can’t pretend anymore!”
7. The Ultimate Dad and Son Bonding Rematch
You’ll find pockets of pure happiness amidst the chaos. It’s like catching lightning when you see Dad and Baby collapse on a mat in the middle of chaos. They are rolling, laughing, having fart noise battles and flinging toys. As a mother, these moments are both hilarious and deeply moving. Your partner and child are totally in sync.
What kind of laughter is that? It’s infectious. You can record clips to send to your family so that even grandparents who are far away will feel the love. You’ll remember these moments when your baby grows up, and your heart will ache as you recall your little boy snorting in Daddy’s arms.
Why “Baby Consciousness” Beats Self-Consciousness
Early parenting is not for the weak-hearted. You have to give up comfort, routines, and even dignity. What replaces it, however, is far more valuable. It’s a combination of spontaneity, connection, and laughter wrapped up in sleepless nights.
The responsibility of parenting demands that shame take a back seat. You learn that you must put your baby’s comfort first, then your mental health, and finally, love. Some people may stare, wonder, or comment. But they usually smile, laugh,h or say “Welcome, parenthood.”
Each ridiculous moment – underground naps, show tune mornings, boob stains on shirts – is a rite-of-passage. It’s no wonder that glossy baby ads don’t include this.
Conclusion
You can be silly, weird, or embarrassing and still feel alive. You realize the value of these moments when your toddler laughs out loud at your silly dance or when your dad is honking his nose on the mat. In a few short years, they’ll seem ridiculous, but you’ll laugh back with fond memories and gratitude.
The life of a new parent is chaotic, noisy, and hilariously out-of-style. But happiness does not wear designer shoes. It’s a T-shirt stained with spit up, a confident smile, and an open heart.
Be the Broadway star at 7 am. Laughing through embarrassment is the best way to get over it. You can be sure that the madness will be worth it.
