Zoë Foster Blake is on a book tour for her first kid’s book, No One Likes a Fart, and she’s sharing some soggy glimpses of her very
leaky glamorous life on the road – without three-month-old daughter Rudy.
Sisterhood of the Travelling Boobs
Owing to the arrow Zoë has placed pointing to her breasts.
And the crossed-arms emoji, symbolising the global symbol for stopping flow in its track.
And the sort of steely focus and set jaw which says “I’m a lactating celebrity, get me out of here now, please, Clare?”
The next photo (below) reveals things went a little pear-shaped (no shade intended, Zoë ).
This photo illustrates that boobs did what boobs are wont to do – and a muscle tee and jeans ensemble became the surprising new order of the day. Bonus points for the sparkly transfer print which may well be waterproof.
And finally, Zoë shared her go-to’s for nursing mums when they’re out on the tear (or on tour or just taking a night off or have tearfully run away from home because SLEEP DEBT!).
It’s a snack/breast pump/hotel room/treat combo and we can’t say it would have been on many pre-parents wishlists, but it’s as covetable as a diamond tennis bracelet, post-kids.
She told The Herald Sun that she had no idea just how much of a tense scramble mum life could be and described the early weeks as brutal.
“You can’t prepare for it. Now [Rudy’s] in a bit more of a routine we’re managing a bit better … I felt so deeply unqualified and out of my depth because they both need you at the same time.”
“That’s the pull. Trying to settle her in a dark room while trying to keep a three-year-old quiet next door or the number of times he’s doing a poo on the toilet and I’m breastfeeding — all on no sleep obviously.”
The writer-CEO-mum-of-two says that she learnt some new tricks the second time around, and those tricks came in the form of a nanny three days a week, and a night nanny in the very early days.
“It sounds lavish but it’s probably the best money spent because we were both working and needed to sleep,” Zoë explained.
“There were some dark days there and I make no apologies for getting someone in to help me get a three-hour block of sleep — a proper shut-door sleep. I didn’t have that with Sonny and I’ve learnt this time to get that help.”
More cute bits and bobs from Zoë
Rudy bounces (and is the perfect combo of her mum and dad!)
The book trailer for No One Likes A Fart
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I’ve been holding this in for so long, MAN it’s great to finally let it out: my picture book No One Likes a Fart is ON SALE TODAY! Why not enjoy this introductory trailer and get to know this little fart with a heart. This book, perfect for ages 3 – 150, is available from all good booksellers and even some of the bad ones hahaha as if such a thing was possible I love you all be sure to put my book in the window like we talked about yeah? Also available from online retailers, enhanced ebook via iTunes, and telepathy. ENJOY! 💨 Sound definitely on! 🔈Definitely let your kids watch it! 100x like mine! #noonelikesafart
Popping in on husband Hamish Blake (and Andy Lee, too!)
You can listen to that here
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I love going on @hamishandandy and no I’m not just saying that because I’m married to 50% of them how dare you. (You’re allowed to be a ‘fan’ of your husband, right? I am. I mean, I wouldn’t let him sign my boobs or anything, but I think he’s very funny.) Anyway, we had a great time, and a lovely chat about my new book, which is all about etiquette, high-tea, and being a lady at all times. (‘Flatulence.’)
Getting ready to chat to Chrissie Swan and friends
— Zoë Foster Blake (@zotheysay) November 12, 2017