Suspend judgement: Pink urges mums to “give ourselves, and each other, a break”

Pink Christmas snaps

Singer and mum-of-two Pink sent out a hopeful message via Twitter yesterday, willing an end to the mummy shaming that often plays out in our lives/on social media, and hoping we can all step away from judging others – and ourselves. 

There’s a broader message of compassion and support that all parents/humans should heed here, too.

“It’s so hard”

On Twitter, Pink explained she’d encountered another “really sweet” mum while out grocery shopping. An exchange between the two had her shaking her head, and hoping for much, much more for weary and worried parents.

Pink’s mum to 1-year-old Jameson and 6-year-old Willow, and while many, many people celebrate her parenting efforts, she’s sadly consistently come under fire for her mum skills, too.

“A really sweet mama came up to me tonight at the grocery store and told me some nice words about how she gets strength from my parenting cause I’m not afraid to fuck up in public,” Pink tweeted. “We cried together. It’s so hard. Y’all. I wish us mamas could give ourselves and each other a break.”

“As they grow, so do we”

Truer words were possibly never spoken and Pink’s followers tweeted back in solidarity, some of them sharing their own thoughts and stories on these so-called mummy wars – and memorable kindnesses they’ve encountered.

“One night 12 years ago I was at a casual fast food restaurant, and my youngest was throwing food, my older ones bickering and my husband embarrassed,” one woman explained. “An older beautiful woman, 75 or 80 yr old woman came up to me, held my hand and said, ‘Don’t expect perfection, your little one is exploring, learning, and growing. Even Jesus threw food, and was a baby.’ She kissed my cheek. That moment has impacted me so deeply. I always stop to encourage mothers with young children. The simple compassion in that tiny moment, still makes me tear up.”

“I truly have no idea why we judge each other so harshly,” another Twitter user posted. “What works for my kids, might not work for your kids. As long as we are all trying the best we can, we are good moms. NO ONE is a perfect mom. But our children are loved, fed and happy. That’s what matters.”

“Every child is different, as every mother,” one follower wrote. “There are no rules. Mistakes get made, we learn we forgive ourself for being human. As they grow, so do we.”

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Go gently

For parents who are struggling through this challenging period, when money is tight and kids are often out of their comfort zone, this reminder to show compassion and support could not have come at a better time.

If YOU are finding this topsy-turvy time to be tricky business, and your kids or family members are trying your patience, know that you are not alone.

Christmas can be the most difficult time of the year for many of us. Go as gently as you can, don’t expect too much of yourself or others, and get as much rest, nourishing food and fresh air as you can.

It’s super important to reach out for support, if you are feeling overwhelmed, too. See the numbers below for some options, or talk to a trusted family member or friend about what you are going through.

In short, MUCH love to all at this lovely/difficult time. And thanks to Pink for reminding us that parenting can be super challenging and we need to support each other as much as possible, all year long.

If you are feeling alone at this very busy and stressful time of year, Lifeline provide counselling and crisis support 24/7 on 13 11 14.

If you or someone you know is struggling with life after having a baby, PANDA is on call and ready to listen and help. PANDA National Helpline (Mon to Fri, 9am – 7.30pm AEST) 1300 726 306

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