Eva Mendes on having kids with Ryan Gosling: “Nobody warns you about the guilt”

Eva Mendes

“Oh my God, nobody warns you about the guilt that you feel when you do work!” Eva said in a recent interview with eNews and parents across the globe nodded, glanced furtively at their bosses and checked in on their kids, in solidarity.

The struggle is real

The actor and her partner, fellow actor Ryan Gosling, are parents to two daughters, 1-year-old Amada and 3-year-old Esmerelda. They generally keep their relationship super-private, so this brief glimpse into mum life – according to Eva – was an unexpected and relatable treat.

The mum-of-two says despite outward appearances, and the obvious advantages her success offers, the work-parenting balance is still tricky to navigate.

“I don’t know how I find balance, because I think it is like a day to day kind of struggle, you know?” (We know. We really do!).

“Survival mode”

Eva said that she tries to make herself – and wellbeing-boosting self care – a priority, but is wrestling with the guilt that comes with taking time out (and so many other aspects of this parenting game.) It’s a scenario that will be familiar to many carers, mums and dads.

“Right now I’m in survival mode with two babies. I’m always running around with the kids. I never sit down—I’m on the move all day,” she told Shape Magazine.

“I’m all for taking care of myself—that’s how I can take care of them, of course—but that guilt that is just kind of always there. It’s like, ‘Ugh, this is gonna be there forever now.'” (Are you nodding? We’re nodding too.)

Keeping it loose

Guilt temporarily put aside, Eva says a freestyle and flexible approach to life with children is the order of the day at her place.

She says she’s simply “mom” in her kids’ eyes – checking her Hollywood privilege at the front door – and giving her kiddos the freedom to be who they want to be is a big part of her parenting focus.

Eva revealed she lets Esmerelda wear “whatever she wants when it comes to clothes. Literally, you wanna wear jammies all day? Wear jammies all day. Like, to me, it is such a beautiful time to be a kid and not have, you know, no pressure,” Eva said.

Family ties

Eva’s parents play a big part in the lives of Esmerelda and Amada, teaching them about the culture and language of their extended family.

“Esmeralda mostly speaks Spanglish right now,” Eva recently told People Magazine. “It’s really cute. She’s definitely bilingual, and it’s really important for us to make sure that she’s not only just familiar with the language, but also with the culture.”

“My mom, who lives 15 minutes away, makes it is easy because she speaks to the girls in Spanish and cooks them Cuban food. And we’re always listening to Cuban music. It really is a big part of our way of life. I wouldn’t have it any other way.” #UmYum

She noted that her daughters are very different, but equally adorable, personality-wise.

“They are pretty opposite. They are both angels, they are just different kinds of angels,” she said.

Chocolate-eating homebodies

Despite her and Ryan’s very public profiles, Eva says she likes nothing better than staying in and hanging with her family.

“I love being home. Instead of hitting the red carpet, I’d rather be with our girls,”  she saidalso quietly revealing that her favourite treat is the the highly delicious Cadbury eggs.

“The mini ones and the big ones with the filling,” she clarified.

This only makes us love her more. (And now we really need an egg.)

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