Mums, it takes a village to raise a child and maintain our sanity. Even the mighty multi-taskers among us need a little help sometimes so let’s support each other instead of tearing other mothers down.
In her latest post – which comes after Babyology revealed how new mums are too scared to ask for advice for fear of being judged – Constance explains how she can relate to a mum sitting near her in a park juggling an uncooperative toddler and a crying newborn.
Constance recalls the stress she felt leaving the house one day with her first two children, how one woman in particular just looked at a clearly frazzled Constance as she yelled at her daughter and shook her head in obvious disapproval.
Constance says she called her aunty, who knew exactly what to say.
“Do you realise that your not supposed to be doing this on your own? We are all supposed to be doing this together, we need to bring the village back. If that woman had have come and strapped Arlo in while you went to grab Billie-Violet, you wouldn’t be feeling like a failure at all. You would be feeling like a member of a community, an extended family that all have each other. I don’t think you’re depressed, I think you just need your village,” Constance reveals her aunty told her.
Here is the full post.
Those wise words struck a chord with Constance, who says she has been collecting her village ever since.
“Most days I leave school with someone else’s kids, someone always has some of mine,” she writes.
“I stop by a friends house and she will scoop some of the curry from her pot into a container for my family while I’m changing her baby’s nappy. And that has been the only way I’ve healed. By finding a village.”
The post continues with Constance explaining how, instead of staring or sneering, she went over to help the other overwhelmed mum in the park.
“I kept creepily watching her, now her toddler had poo’d and it was pretty obvious by the fact that she mouthed the words ‘f**king hell’ that she didn’t have a nappy or a nappy wipe. I did. I approached her and asked if I could help,” Constance writes.
“She told me that she doesn’t know why she bothers leaving the house she feels so unorganised, I was like
“please … Her name is Jess, we sat together and de-loner’d for the morning and are even catching up again tomorrow.
“So just like that… Our village is growing.”
Just imagine if every mum, heck every parent, was a helper and not a judgmental head shaker.