Parenting

My 6 Sanity-Saving Parenting Resolutions

6 Parenting Resolutions I Will Make This Year 

Every December, I find myself making the same parenting resolutions. You know the drill: get the kids to eat their greens more, teach them how to ride their bikes with no training wheels, and dust off the parenting books that you swore you read in January.

What about this year? This year, it’s different.

I am entering the New Year on fumes after a long and emotionally draining stretch of parenting. I’m tired–physically, emotionally, spiritually. You can’t get rid of this kind of fatigue with a solid night’s rest or strong coffee. The kind of fatigue that results from always putting yourself last.

This year, I am flipping the script.

I don’t make resolutions to be a better parent by doing more. I am making resolutions to focus on myself – my mental health, relationships, and my well-being – because I have finally realized something I should have accepted long ago:

Being a happy, healthy human is the best way to become a good parent.

The Brutal Truth About My Last Year of Parenting

Let me paint a picture. I spent the last year in survival mode parenting. My days were filled with school runs and packing lunches. I was cleaning up messes left by the children, reminding them to do their homework.

My 6 Sanity-Saving Parenting Resolutions
My 6 Sanity-Saving Parenting Resolutions

The weekend brought no relief – birthday parties, shopping trips, swimming lessons, and more laundry.

In all of that, I’ve lost something. It’s not just about time or energy. I lost joy. I lost the joy of parenting. I losmyselfme.

It was a few months ago that I found the gift that my mother had given me 4 years earlier, a beautiful bath caddy, still in its box. The idea was to use it for relaxing baths, with music, candles, and perhaps a glass of wine or a book.

Sounds dreamy, right?

Not even once. Not even once. For four years, I haven’t taken a bath.

It’s more than sad. It’s telling. This tells me that I have been in a full-on sacrifice mode — always giving and rarely receiving. Always caring but rarely being cared for by myself.

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This year, I will draw a line. I am making 6 unapologetic, selfish parenting resolutions. Not because I don’t care about my children, but because I care, I am so passionate about I feel I must change how I live for them and myself.

1. Be Kind (to yourself first)

I have always been proud of my ability to be kind. I try to talk my friends out of their guilt spirals. When mums are doubting themselves, I encourage them. I tell them, “You are doing the best that you can,” “You are a wonderful mum,” and “Give yourself grace.”

What about me? The voice in my mind is brutal.

You snapped again today.
You let them watch too much TV.
You forgot to bring the permit. Again.”
Why can’t you organize yourself better?
Other mums seemed to be able to handle it better.

This year, I will silence that voice.

If don’t’t tell a friend what I’m thinking, I won’t tell myself. I will replace that criticism with kindness.

“I show up every day.”
It’s all because of me that my children are safe and loved.
“I’m enough. “I rock.”

Self-compassion is not self-indulgent. It’s foundational.

2. Schedule Self-Care in Your Calendar

Let’s talk self-care. The unicorn of motherhood. We all know how important this is, but we still leave it up to chance. We wait for the mythical pocket of time between cooking dinner, doing homework, and answering emails at work to appear.

Spoiler: That moment never comes.

This year, self-care is treated like any other appointment. It’s on the calendar. I schedule it.

It’s not something I will apologize for. When I give more to myself, I can give more to others. It’s simple science, or at least common sense.

A Mother Kissing Her New Born
A Mother Kissing Her Newborn

3. Make Time with My Kids Count

Here’s an uncomfortable truth that I have been avoiding. A lot of my time with my children has been functional.

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Yes, I am with them. But I also rush them out the door. I remind them (again!) to brush their teeth. I shut them to bed. I try to pull them away from screens.

It’s not what I want to be known as.

This year, I am changing my approach. I will spend quality time on purpose with each of my children, not to be productive, but for connection.

It doesn’t matter if it was 15 minutes of playing cards with them after dinner, baking together on Sunday, or taking a walk alone with a child. I want them to remember the way it made them feel and not just what I did.

4. Bring Back Date Nights This Time (For Real)

Date nights were commonplace before kids. We would go out and talk about everything and anything, reconnect, and feel like we owned the world.

Now? The majority of evenings we spend on the couch with one half asleep and the other scrolling.

Romance is now a matter of convenience. Survival has trumped connection.

I miss my partner, the person I fell for and used to spend hours talking to about dreams that did not involve school uniforms or packed meals.

In this new year, I will make it happen. Date night is back. I want us to be together again.

Raising a family should not erode our relationship, but strengthen it.

5. Reclaim What Makes Me Feel Alive

Before I became a mother, I was passionate about other things. Before I had children, I had passions that were not related to nap schedules and playdates.

I enjoyed reading books that didn’t focus on parenting. I would go to the Sunday market, drive spontaneously, and listen to entire albums with my windows down.

These parts of me did not disappear when I became a mum, but they did go into hiding.

This year, I will dust them off. I dust them off. I’m discovering who I am beyond my role as “Mum.”

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I will read real, paper books. I will drink coffee alone in cafes and not feel bad. I will explore hobbies even if they are not my strong suit. I’m bringing myself into the picture.

The more fulfilled I am personally, the more energetic I am as a mother.

6. Keep it Simple, Keep it Slow

Last year was a blur. A fast-paced, frantic, blink-and-it s-over blur.

Amid work, school and errands, and activities, as well as the constant pressure to be and do more, I didn’t feel that much.

This year, I would like to slow down.

I want more spontaneity and fewer scheduled activities. I want lazy mornings and weekends with long cuddles.

I don’t want to glorify “busy” anymore. I want to simplify my life wherever possible. I want fewer after-school obligations, less rushing, nd more time to sit with my children, soak them up while they are still young enough to climb onto my lap.

More heart. Less hustle.

The Adventure of Solo Motherhood
The Adventure of Solo Motherhood

Conclusion

I don’t make these resolutions to be a “perfect” parent. I no longer believe in perfect parenting. I believe in current parenting. I must first show up for myself.

The six changes I’ve made may seem insignificant, like simple shifts in attitude or schedules. But they will have a huge ripple effect on me and my family. Happier me = more patient mum. A more connected wife. A more grounded person.

This year I am going to myself, not because of being a mother, but due to it.

I want my children to grow up in a home that is filled with joy, love, rest, and connection.

How about you? Do you have any resolutions for this year? Not just for you and your family but also for yourself? Make this year the one where we show our children what it means to thrive and not just survive.

Leave your parenting resolutions in the comments. Let’s encourage each other.

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