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Managing a Clingy Child: How I Get Things Done

Managing a Clingy Child: How I Get Things Done

If you read, then you have probably come across a clingy baby. You know the kind of baby who won’t let go and cries hysterically if you try to leave. If this sounds like you, you’re not alone. My 10-month-old is going through a very clingy phase. It’s been an adventure.

Even though I’m constantly holding or comforting my child, I still manage to get through the day. I’ve figured out ways to help me survive (and thrive) during this clingy stage. If you are in a similar position, keep reading. You can still get things done and maintain your sanity while caring for your child.

I have learned a few tricks to help me juggle the needs of my baby and my ever-growing to-do-list.

Why do babies cling to their parents?

This phase is well-known. This phase usually happens around nine months. Often, this phase is referred to as “Velcro Baby.” Why is this? Separation anxiety may be a factor behind this clinginess. Around nine months, babies start to understand that their parents are different. This is an important cognitive milestone. They may not have realized that you are a separate entity and can leave at any time. They panic once they understand this.

Managing a Clingy Child
Managing a Clingy Child

You baby may not be able to comprehend that you will return after you leave. They feel the end of their world when you leave. The old ways of playing on the floor, hanging out with dad or being left with a toy are no longer sufficient. The concept of object permanence–understanding that things and people still exist even when they’re out of sight–is still developing at this stage. If they don’t see you they will assume that you are gone forever. It can be difficult for your child to leave even for a short time.

Remember that this clinginess indicates your baby’s attachment to you. This is healthy and positive. It can be exhausting, as they are constantly attached to you. It’s the stage where they follow you like a shadow and watch your every move. They also cry when you leave a room. This phase can be overwhelming but is a part of their emotional growth. You need to reassure them that you’ll always be there, even if it isn’t something they fully understand.

Your baby will likely experience distress during this period when you are not in their line of sight. They are emotionally challenged by the feeling of separation from you. This phase will pass when they grow up and learn to trust you. You may feel constantly alert, as they want to be near you all the time. Try to remember that their need for you stems from a desire to feel loved and safe. Even though it can be exhausting, these moments are part of the child’s development and will pass.

Life with a Clingy Child: The Struggle is Real

Even though I enjoy cuddling my son and bonding, holding him all the time is seriously hindering me from getting even basic tasks completed. It’s not about the work I do, but everyday tasks like cleaning up, cooking, or even taking a shower. It can be a Herculean effort to keep my baby entertained for even 10 minutes.

I have had to be creative in order to do the laundry, make my bed or grab a snack without having an emotional breakdown. At times, I feel like I can’t do something as simple as taking a shower, without my son screaming on the other side. Let’s not mention the daily struggle of him climbing me, resulting in my pants being pulled at the worst possible times. Yes, I do think I need to buy a belt.

Hey, I’ve accepted it. Instead of just giving up, I have come up with a few tips and tricks that will keep the house from becoming a disaster. Here are some of my best strategies to survive the clingy stage without losing productivity or my sanity.

1. You can save your life by using a baby carrier

The carrier was a necessity in my life when my child was younger. The carrier was my bestie, because I needed my hands to be free and also had to deal with reflux. As my son grew older, I stopped using the carrier as often. Since my son is in his clingy stage, I have rediscovered the magic that the baby carrier has to offer. It’s been a real game changer.

Yesterday I was able, with him strapped in, to unload the dishwasher and take out the recyclables, fold the clothes, make the bed, and walk to the pharmacy without him becoming a sobbing mess. I was able to hold him close and still get things done. I was extra cautious not to let him pick up sharp objects, but the carrier allowed me to do other things while still keeping him close.

My husband also loves to use the carrier. This is not just for “mums” – it works for everyone. Do yourself a favor and get a baby carrier if you don’t have one already. It’ll be a huge difference.

2. Buy Up on Peas and Sultanas!

Food can be a great way to distract yourself from your tasks. If my baby is clingy, he’ll sit in the highchair for longer if there is food in front of him. What is my favorite food? What’s your favorite food? What’s your favourite?

You may ask, “Why sultanas and peas?” These are round, small and easy for little hands to hold. He’s occupied for long enough so I can breathe. You can use these few minutes to prepare a meal, or make the bed. I can complete my task without having to hear him yell “Pick me!” by filling his tray up with peas and sultanas.

Uncut grapes may cause choking. Safety first! If I keep a supply on hand of sultanas or peas, I can usually get 30 minutes of productive time. It’s important to have a supply of these snacks on hand. Whether it’s frozen peas in a bag or a jar with sultanas. Having them ready can make a big difference. When I see my baby’s focus on getting the peas in his mouth, it makes me feel like I have won at life. These small moments are what keep the chaos under control!

Father and his Little son Enjoying Activity
Father and his Little son Enjoying Activity

3. Fill up the Bottom Drawer of Your Kitchen

It’s a tried-and-true trick that has been around forever. Fill one of the lower drawers in your kitchen with interesting and safe items that your baby can explore. Think of wooden spoons and plastic cups. Also, think about egg cups and basting brushes. You want to create a treasure chest of items that can keep your child busy while you do some work.

It’s great that babies are interested in things that may not be “toys”, but are still safe and fun. They’ll grab it if you leave the drawer open slightly. What’s the best part? While they are rummaging through your “toybox,” you can cook, load the dishwasher or even clean up.

Just a warning: Babies move quickly, so be careful not to step on them as they crawl. This tip is great, but you can easily trip over them when they are right underfoot.

4. Moving ‘forbidden’ items from room to room

You can’t stop your baby from wanting remote controls, hairbrushes and even your phone. I began to take these “forbidden” items with me when I had to do chores around the house.

I bring an old hairbrush or remote control into the room where I’m working. Then I make a big show of saying “No!” What’s this? My baby was captured immediately. Introduce the forbidden item as quickly as possible. You can then continue working. It may seem ridiculous, but this actually works.

It won’t buy you any hours, but this tactic can be used to distract them long enough for them to finish a few simple tasks. This is a small victory, but you may only need a few moments of peace in order to accomplish something important. It also gives your child the opportunity to engage and explore something new. This helps satisfy their curiosity for a little while. Rotate the prohibited items to keep them fresh. Before you know it, there will be a few moments of uninterrupted time to accomplish things!

5. Run and Hide

It may appear a little sneaky but it’s sometimes needed. If you’re working from home or your partner is taking care of the baby, you need to “go in stealth mode”.

If you let them see or hear you, you will have a meltdown. You can trust in me. It’s something I had to learn the hard way. If you don’t have them, close the door or go into another room. You may need to use the phone or do some other tasks quietly, but DON’T allow them to locate you.

It’s a little like playing “peek-aboo” on survival mode. This can prevent a meltdown, and allow you to take a breather. It’s important to distract them. If they can’t see you or hear you, then they may forget and give you a moment of peace. Sometimes, this is the only way to maintain your sanity. Remember to stay in stealth mode until you can reappear to offer comfort without the panic.

 

Mom and Son Having Fun
Mom and Son Having Fun

Conclusion: Surviving an Adorable Child

This is my survival guide for dealing with a clingy baby and getting things done. I was able to keep my head without losing it, despite a baby that was always clinging. A baby carrier, raisins and peas, as well as some simple tricks, have helped me balance my need to be productive with my baby’s need for closeness. After a lot of trial and errors, I have found a rhythm for both my baby and myself, even when the list seems endless.

It will pass. Soon, your child will be more independent. While the constant need for your attention may feel exhausting, you will miss these moments once they no longer depend on you. Even if you have to take small steps, try to enjoy the cuddles. Celebrate your small victories, whether you’ve managed to cook dinner without interruptions or sneak a few quiet minutes while your child plays.

Mama, you’re a champ! When you’re in the whirlwind that is motherhood, it’s easy for you to forget about your own strength. But every small step you take shows how resilient you really are. You can enjoy the moments you have with your child, but remember that they will soon be replaced by new growth stages. Above all, believe in yourself. You are doing a great job. You’ll get through this difficult phase stronger than ever before with patience, persistence and creativity.

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