One is a mum coping with pregnancy loss. Another is a working mum to two very young children. Another is a mum struggling with accepting her inability to breastfeed.
All of these women have one thing in common – they’ve all taken a hit in that unspoken battle better known as the mummy wars . It’s something every mum out there can understand – the feeling of being judged while also judging other mums.
From one mum to another, please, if you have time to watch one thing today, then this should be it.
American formula company Similac has dug deep into the heart of “mummy wars” with a touching campaign that has left me lost for words (and, if you know my writing, then you know this is almost impossible to do).
Almost every mum admits to feeling judged in some way by other mothers. This is the incredibly moving story of some of these mums who not only describe what life is behind closed doors, but also explain their reasoning behind why they feel judged and why they admit to judging other mums.
“I was very judgemental before I was a parent,” one of the mums admits. The mums are honest. The stories are relatable. And the message is clear. It’s time to end the mummy wars.
Let yourself share their thoughts. Let yourself smile. Let yourself cry. Remind yourself of the messages:
“We can be a sisterhood and we can support one another.”
“It doesn’t matter what other people think is right or wrong. It’s up to you.”
And you are doing everything right.
This goes for the mums who are combining sleep deprivation with meal planning, who are balancing late afternoon meetings with pumping in the toilets.
This goes for the mums who have to drop their little ones off at day-care every morning and wait to cry until after the doors have been shut, who are combating feelings of guilt for being at work with feelings of anxiety about losing their jobs.
This goes for the bottle feeding mums who cope with stares from strangers and struggle with self doubt every time they mix together a bottle, and for the breastfeeding mums who feel the need to cover up any time their baby is hungry.
This goes for the mums who want everything to be perfect, who want the best for their child and who strive to find the cutest cot set and the prettiest christening cake.
This goes for the mums who have children close together and for the mums who have children far apart.
This goes for the mums who have children outside of marriage and for the mums who are raising their children alone.
This goes for the mums who prefer to dress their little girls as princesses, and for the mums who don’t.
And, finally, this goes for the mums who have experienced infant or pregnancy loss, who will always have a missing piece in their hearts, who will often have those moments and wonder “what if”.
You are not alone. Every mum faces similar struggles, similar self-doubt and similar judgement.
As one of the mums explains at the end, “There’s nothing more satisfying to hear that you are doing a great job from another mum. That’s sometimes all you need to hear.”
And, most importantly, it’s something every mum deserves to believe.