Thank you for NOT calling: This is why you’ll only get a text from a mum

Woman texting on mobile phone

I rarely call my mother-in-law these days but it’s not because I don’t like her. I’m actually quite fond of the old bat. It’s just that I don’t have an hour to spare chatting to her. You see my MIL loves to talk on the phone and I just can’t do it anymore. 

The bigger problem is that she doesn’t have a mobile phone, so texting the words, ‘can we visit on Sunday?’ is out. It’s a phone call or no visit. But if I’m being brutally honest, you should know that if I can’t text you, then you’re not going to hear from me much – if at all. It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with having little ones. Let me explain. 

Just a short phone call 

Yesterday I needed to make a simple doctors appointment. After strategically plonking my boys in front of Paw Patrol, I dialled the number and the conversation went like this:

“Yes, hello, I’d like to make an appoint … oh hang on, sorry, my toddler just pushed the TV remote and … oh OK, fixed, I’m back. As I was saying I’d like to … shhh … make an appointment … here have some sultanas but go back to the couch please … sorry about that, do you have any appointments on Friday? Yes? … Don’t cry, just pick them up, shhh … I’ll take that. Oh actually, hang on, sorry, I’ll just step outside so you can hear me over the noise. Is that better? Yes, as I was saying Friday morning is, oh I’m sorry, I’ll have to call you back.

And the reason I had to call back? My preschooler ‘stole’ a sultana from my toddler who was picking them up off the floor and a pushing fight erupted that needed my intervention. Not even sultanas are safe. Sigh. 

Mum on phone with baby in arms

Please don’t call me

Before I had kids I’d love nothing more than to make a hot cup of tea and chat away to a dear friend on the phone. Even if it wasn’t a long conversation, I was able to think clearly, laugh freely and effortlessly communicate my thoughts without a little person interrupting me 50 times. 

My phone usually rings out these days. I either don’t get to it in time, thanks to being mid-nappy change for instance, or I know there’s no point answering it because it isn’t a good time to chat. One of my boys might be having a meltdown over their train track breaking or I am trying to get them dressed and out the door for swimming. And if it is a good time, because they are in bed asleep, for instance, I’m usually too exhausted to talk and falling asleep next to them.  

Whereas texting is easy

These days texting is my – and all of my mum-friends – preferred method of communication. It seems all of us are having the same phone issues. Here’s one of our typical text convos: 

Me: Wanna meet at the playground with the ducks at 10am?

Reply: Can we make it 10:30? Poo explosion. Full outfit change!

Me: Ha! Yep, c u then x

See, easy!

Next time, please text me. I promise I still want to be in your life, I just can’t always chat on the phone. 

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