When good names go bad – the worst in baby name spellings
Attention, spelling police! Look away now. You won’t be able to read this without cringing. Maybe have a red pen on hand.
We get it. Naming your baby is a big decision. And many parents want to choose a name that expresses themselves in a way that is unique and creative. Choosing to spell a common name uniquely is one way to achieve this.
Many people love a uniquely spelled name. Many people do not. And while it is entirely up to the parents, sometimes it’s best to stick to the basics. Just an idea!
So without further ado, here are the top offenders and terrible trends in improper spelling thanks to our Babyology community, who shared with us the worst of the very worst.
The baby names guaranteed to give your child a complex
Because they may find themselves having to spell it out again and again for bookings, Medicare, passports, university, jobs, application forms, coffee orders … and so on.
- Khai-Leigh – When you really love Kylie Minogue, but you’re also a massive Game of Thrones fan …
- Pheona – Pheobe and Fiona are both lovely names. So why not combine them?
- Tiphaniee – Also known as “Tiffany”. I know. I thought it said TeePee too.
- Merandah – When you combine the perfectly acceptable name of Miranda with a verandah.
- Jessieighkah – “Eigh” does not belong anywhere, okeigh?
- Vyolette – A violet by any other name definitely doesn’t look so sweet.
- Thyeson – Apologies to ‘thye son’ of mine who will forever go through life being identified as Shakespearean prose. Oh, and by the way, this name is pronounced “Tyson”.
- Alyzzabeth – Close enough to Elizabeth.
- Soosin – So so so wrong. Sorry Susan.
- Mackquelliegha – What is this abomination of a word? Michaela. Oh dear lord.
- Paizleigh – “Because I want my child to be different … And hate me forever.”
- Alexzandre – Alexander is a beautiful name. But then this happened.
- Xzavier – Wh happens when you can’t decide whether to go with a Z or a X.
- Mykel – This is what happens when Michael’s parents have one too many painkillers in the labour ward.
The baby names where adding in a bunch of vowels seemed like a smart move
Let’s make our name unique by adding in a few extra vowels. Sorry parents. But bad choice.
- Taiydaoum – I know, let’s find a name that includes every vowel in the English language. Except E of course. Because that would be weird.
- Ivey – Oh look, the missing E.
- Teighyiaha – This is the 10-letter equivalent to Tia, with seven extra letters thrown in just for fun.
- Jaeysin – There’s no I in Jason. Oh wait … turns out there is.
- Aliviyah – Olivia is one of the most popular names of last year. Aliviyah made a list too – it placed third on the worst baby names ever (seriously, ever).
- Ehrynne – This says Erin, for anyone who is trying to keep up.
- Sofhiyah -The dreaded ‘YAH’ combination is back and ruining another popular name – Sophia.
The baby names where vowels are no longer allowed
These are the names where the parents clearly decided to forgo a name and just used initials instead. Because being able to tell everyone your child can spell her name at the age of two is a big deal, okay?
- R’Chee – poor poor Archie.
- KC – It’s not that hard to spell Casey, guys!
- JL – Again, Jael is a fairly easy one to spell.
- Le-a – (pronounced Le-dash-a) because the dash isn’t silent.
The Kardashian Konundrum
What’s wrong with the letter C? It’s a good letter, dammit. Here’s a few more that will probably keep you kringing (sorry, I had to do it).
- Klayton
- Kameron
- Klancy
- Kassandra
- Kooper (or, even better), Koopa …
Of course, there are two sides to every story. Often a baby’s name is selected due to the cultural heritage of the parents. Other times, awful spelling runs in the family. Some may also be based on a word from a different language. For example, Lukas and Jakob are both incredibly popular in Europe.
Because, let’s face it. If Olivia and Elyviia (or however it is supposed to be spelled) both applied for a job in 20 years’ time, who would you hire? The person with the name that won’t be tripped over? Or the person whose name sounds like her parents were on acid when deciding on what to name their child?
Sorry Allyvia. Your parents do love you. They just have a weird way of showing it.
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