So you’re standing in the queue at the supermarket and your eyes land on a trashy magazine – the cover features a singer/actress/ model who is proudly showing off her ‘post-baby’ body. In a tiny bikini, of course. You can’t help but reach for the magazine and quickly scan the article – how did she do it? Sure, I think, if I had a staff of nannies, chefs and personal trainers, I could look like that too.
Now for the reality check – before I had kids, even at my fittest and full of twenty-something body confidence, I never looked like any of those celebrities. So it stands to reason, I’ll never achieve that kind of body after having had four babies!
I had my last baby almost five years ago – I have accepted the fact that my body won’t ‘go back’ to what it was (in fact my obstetrician helpfully explained the state of my stomach muscles – “You know when you have a piece of elastic and it’s overstretched? It won’t spring back and is frayed around the edges?”).
When I had my first baby I had no idea how my body would change. No one really tells you. Until now.
The Shape of a Mother is a website dedicated to showing real mothers’ bodies - stretch marks, dimples, saggy skin, scars and all. Bonnie Crowder created the website to address the fact that the post-pregnancy body is kept a ‘secret’ – she wanted women to have a forum to show their post-birth bodies and offer support to those struggling with their body image during pregnancy or after birth.
Readers upload their own pictures and stories – some bare their souls and tell of their battles with ‘baby weight’. Others happily defy the pressure to ‘get their body back’ and show-off their c-section scars, wonky boobs and networks of stretch marks proudly.
The website makes for interesting and inspiring reading. Would you post your story to Shape of a Mother?
(via Daily Mail)
15 Comments
I would, I completely understand what its like to look at the pics of celebrities and not one bit of me can be compared to them. I am real, I am untouched, I am me!
All gets back to how unrealistically the media portrays women in those Women’s Magazines doesn’t it.
Great to see ‘real tummies’. We should be embracing motherhood rather than creating unrealistic expectations.
… Then again I’m not sure I’d want my post THREE BABY tummy shown to the world.
Finally someone has got the nerve to show how we / some of us look like after babies, my husband called my boobs, national geographic after breast feeding, hey i didn’t mind, i was nourishing our baby..and my body well good on the above picture as that is what i have after 2 c sections, trying very hard to just tone up, but i’m happy, swimming helps a lot, but i want to enjoy my baby, not have to huff and puff to get back to celebrity status, So i say take a look at us really women and yes Pink is happy to lose it naturally too….She is an inspiration..
My stomach looked like the photo at the top. I was luckily able to lose the weight easily enough (thank you breastfeeding and we shall see if it happens again after the second baby as I know it might not) but that loose skin was still there – well until it was needed to accommodate my growing bump.
Those celebs who get back those amazing post-preg bellies with nary a stretchmark in sight owe it all to a combo of genetics and possibly P/T and diet, but mostly good genes I think.
Were you fit and healthy, taut and terrific, balanced diet, happy and vigorous before baby? My guess is ‘no’. It’s a slippery slope. I see teens who are jelly and sloppy. There’s no way back. Shame people have to have a heart attack before they make resolutions about their health! I grew up with strict parents. “I’m thirsty”, “drink water”, “I’m hungry” “eat an apple”. Parents need some backbone NOW and then they/we will prevent our kids from growing fatally unwell before their time.
I don’t think its fair to judge anyones shape after birth whether good or bad we all went through being pregnant and giving birth we should all give each other credit for that!As for bodies well I think this site should post all pics good and bad and maybe we could all share tips on how to get our bodies back in shape.I say give credit on the ones for getting their body back in shape,lucky you to the ones who are just blessed to not have their body very effected and ones that aren’t to concerned about how u look good on you for not being worried about what other people think!
Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all finally accept the way ourselves and other women looked liked. It’s sad that we all judge the back in her bikini mum or the mum who can’t lose the baby weight.
Let’s change that attitude ladies :-)
♥♥♥♥ Love this!!
After just having my second baby 4 weeks ago, it is kind of a relief to not only see the pictures of other women who don’t “bounce back” but to also read all your comments (apart from Renee’s!) and know that I’m not alone!!
I’ll admit, I kind of bounced back after my first. I was very lucky and escaped the stretch marks and only had a bit of a flabby belly.
I wasn’t so lucky with my second though…. Stretch marks from my boobs all the way down to my knees. I now have that little “flap” as well.
Sure, if I wanted too, I could probably head out for hours and work out, be on a diet and all that crap. But I much rather spending that time with my little ones. Each easy bowl of noodles I make, or the not to healthy pre-frozen meals that we eat take a lot less time to prepare than a healthy meal. Each day I stay at home instead of exercising is more time I get to play with my 2 year old so he doesn’t feel left out.
I had my children (and will probably have more) because I enjoy being around them and nurturing and teaching them. It would be a lie if I said I didn’t care how I look, but I realise that there are more important things I can do with my time than try and get “good looking”.
Plus my partner loves me and is hanging around me even more now that I’ve had our second child.
None of us has the exact same body shape before pregnancy so of course none of us has the exact same body shape after pregnancy. I never had a ‘perfect’ body before my bubs – always a little jiggly and roly poly – and I’m the same now – no worse, no better. Just me. Love your mind, love your kids, love your lovers and your family and friends, love the earth and nature and great ideas. But don’t get so wrapped up in loving your body. Just flesh and bones. Love what your body can do, make, enjoy. Enjoy
I really hate that this perpetuates the myth that pregnancy means the end of a great body. If you’re in good health before you get pregnant and stay healthy, you can have a fantastic body post pregnancy. These pics represent a minority and don’t speak to the majority of the mums in the mothers groups I go to.
I think these photos ae beautiful. Every woman needs support regardless of how you look after having a baby, and noody should expect to look perfect. I worked to get back to pre-pregnancy, but still have a body similar to above and I think it is horrible to say that it looks awfull and that you would have post-natal depression if you looked like that. Post-natal depression is not a laughing matter and neither is a post baby body. Just be happy to be who you are and be happy with the gift you have bought into the world, be healthy and don’t listen to anybody who has any sort of negativity, and that includes comments like that from Renee Manning.
Love who you are and your baby.
I have embraced my mommy tattoos (stretch marks) as it is what makes me a mom & real woman. Love this
Very nice pictures and interesting information.
I have to say my body is better now after having two kids than it was before, but it comes with hard work I exercise and eat healthy, no sugar and no wheat which has allowed my body to drop weight off and feel more energised. I also contribute to getting my belly back down to normal shape by breastfeeding and doing the post natal exercises the hospital recommends you do. The boobs however will never look perky again but I’m ok with this as I was able to BF for over 12months with both my kids giving them a great start to a healthy life. If I didn’t do this for myself then I would be overweight and unhealthy.
I was just under 300lbs with my first child. I breastfed for 11 months, and was so busy making sure he was cared for, I put myself on the back burner. With my second, I kept working almost till my delivery, ate sensible, and only gained half the weight I had with my first. 11 years later I finally made a choice to stop making excuses for my poor health. My kids saw it as an awesome thing that their mom could drop 80lbs because of a lifestyle change, not a diet. I am now between 175-180lbs and I am working on getting more fit. Life is hard, but waking up one day an old woman regretting what I never attempted, but always dreamt about would be harder. Balancing family and your needs is harder then moving a mountain some days, but excuses are just that, excuses, and kids are watching how we live our lives. How terrible to show them it’s ok to except something that can be changed, but requires hard work, but too hard to bother with and you settle and say “It’s ok, this is who I am” when you know your inner self is screaming at you to get moving on your dream of re-gaining your body and your life!!