I breastfed four babies. I also bottle-fed them. For a variety of reasons I had to express and then feed via a bottle with my first baby. The prejudice I encountered (mostly from complete strangers) because I was ‘bottle-feeding’ (regardless of what was in the bottle) was extraordinary and extremely confronting as a new mother. But it was also a valuable learning experience. From the outset, I learnt that mothers do what they have to do to get by, to be happy and to make it work for them. And I didn’t judge another mother’s choices or situation because of that.
So keeping that non-judgemental tone in mind, check out Bottle Babies. It’s a website that has been set up to support parents that are bottle-feeding and to educate society about bottle-feeding, acknowledging that the way in which a parent responsibly feeds a child has no impact on the type of parents they are.
“All parents deserve respect, understanding and good advice in regard to feeding their child…”
As well as offering emotional support, there’s all sorts of practical advice – it’s an excellent and much needed resource for basic information such as which bottle to use, how to clean bottles, the ins and outs of formula and much more. I certainly found that when I was seeking information it was invariably biased by the commercial interest of formula and bottle brands.
The word ‘non-judgemental’ has been used a couple of times in this post – remember that when you hit the ‘Comments’ section!
13 Comments
Thank you so much for giving us ‘bottle feeding’ parents/mums this info. As one myself, I too find I can feel a little upset and even embarrassed about bottle feeding my baby boy. I, unfortunately had no choice in the matter. Having had an eclamptic seizure during labour I was placed on a whole cocktail of drugs after an emergency cesarean (including some for hypertension) so couldn’t breastfeed. I have always thought something like this was needed and really do appreciate you sharing. :-)
I didn’t even consider breastfeeding my son. Its just not for me and I know if I had failed for whatever reason would have bad for both of us. I had numerous arguments with my mother about it before he was born and I now have a happy healthy 18 month old. I don’t understand the stigma. Formula is so great now that there really is no problem.
I bottle fed all 3 of my children and they are all happy, healthy, well loved kids. I think it’s not how they are fed but how much they are loved and cared for that matters.
I breastfeed for 4 wonderful months and I had to stop to have some post baby surgery. After my operation when I was in recovery the nurse gave me a lecture on how I should still continue to breastfeed and I was being selfish. The operation and ongowing medication actually gets absorbed into the breastmilk. My doctor and I had discussed this for four long and painful months where I put my baby first!
My only issue I have with mothers who choose to bottle feed are often uneducated on the topic. I’ve heard many people say there are more vitamins in formula, the baby sleeps through faster, the baby will learn to feed themselves. I never judge a mother I don’t know but I do feel a little judgemental when speaking to someone who has clearly chosen to bottlefeed for themselves without considering the benifits for their baby. They are unfortunately the ones who give every other bottle feeding mother (majority) a bad name.
I have bottled fead my now 4 kids I think it’s a parents choice to bottle or breast personally I wouldn’t feel comfortable breast feeding in public .all my babies have been very content and great sleepers were as friends off mine babies that were breast fead were so much more unsettled
I think It hurts for everyone at first it killed me wen i first breastfeed my son for about a week or two then it goes away theres a cream u use my daughter liked the bottle mote and didnt want to breast feed anymore so he had bottles after 2-3 mnths my son 6 mnths now i want to stop him coz at night he eats forblike 2 hra bfor he sleeps but he doesnt like the bottle picky babies so i dont know how do i make him take the bottle if he refuses it?
At the end of the day the most important thing is to feed your baby! Does it really matter if bub is fed from a bottle or a boob? It’s your baby, your decision.
I must say i breastfeed my baby and i do not judge people who bottle-feed because of low milk supply, ect ect. But comments like i didn’t breastfeed because i want to have uninterrupted sleep is kinda selfish.That’s motherhood for you.
Just saying…………..
One more reason for me to love Babyology – thankyou :)
I looked for a resource like this with my first baby, I was totally unprepared for bottlefeeding and didn’t know anyone who did so found it so difficult to find help. I was warned by my OB I might not be able to breastfeed but naively didn’t think I’d have a problem – there is a physical reason why I can’t breastfeed but personally I think its irrelevant. I support anyone who decides to bottle feed, even if its so they can get sleep or frankly don’t want to do it. Calling someone selfish for choosing what they want to do with their own bodies is ridiculous.
I remember crying the first time I gave my little one a bottle because I felt I was giving him MacDonalds.
There had been such pressure to breast feed and I had always wanted to, that when I couldn’t I was so distressed.
I hadn’t made “peace” with possible alternatives to feeding my child. Our anti natal classes had covered everything from natural birth to other options and it had given me time to come to terms with sometimes things don’t always work out as you expect…… but that is not what makes you a mother…… I wish I had been given the same chance to explore and make peace with feeding my little one.
I had milk supply problems with my first child and the poor little thing was starving. I was sent to ‘breast feeding camp’, had multiple home visits from midwives and finally after 2 weeks and him losing more than 10 % of his body weight – I was finally encouraged to bottle feed. I had no idea what I was doing and was totally influenced by the midwives and their own agenda. In hospital with my second child I was having the same issues with supply so I decided there and then to bottle feed immediately. I asked the midwife on duty for some baby formula and she said ‘We don’t carry formula here – we are a baby friendly hospital’. Unbelievable! If I had been a first time mum this would have been devastating to hear. As it was I just laughed it off and forgave her ignorance.
When my 2nd baby was 2 days old my milk hadn’t come in yet, she was dehydrated and had jaundice. The doctor examined her and said she needed formula top ups until my milk came in. I agreed to this plan, the midwife was then sent in by the doctor to organise some formula and instead she was incredibly rude, literally telling me off! Some midwives are way too militant about breastfeeding, pushing for breastfeeding at the expense of a baby’s health. I had breastfed baby #1 for a year and knew what I was talking about so was able to tell her off right back, but had I been a first time mum, it would have been traumatic I think!
I have to add as a breastfeeding mum I’m sick of the judgemental looks I get from women when feeding in public! why can’t we all just be nice to each other motherhood is hard enough without the judging!